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| The time is now to make your mark in my blog for anyone has not done so here. To those have passed through here thank you for reading,watching, and posting I really have appreciate it. You can skim and read my blog here. I am making one small change if you come to my blog and post. I will comment on your blog. I feel more comfortable that way. Sometimes I will leave a comment if something interests me at random in your blog.
In Memory of my Father
1925-2004
In Memory of my Mother
1927-2009 |
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The Screw Driver Video
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Posted:May 22, 2009 11:38 pm
Last Updated:Oct 6, 2010 12:40 pm
10486 Views
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I made a new video here it is available for everyone to see here. I hope it will be enjoyable for everyone. I use little of the screw driver and a dildo in the video. I also wearing a new bra and thong. I have not done a video over a year now. So this is the first one since then. It is very hard to come up with new ideas here. Let me know what you think here? Just being adventurous.
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2
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Reopening The Flood Gates
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Posted:May 20, 2009 7:05 am
Last Updated:Jun 1, 2009 8:13 am
10693 Views
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I have opened up my blog here so everyone can read. I think I am ready here to start blogging more. I originally closed it because of relatives could be peeking in here. I am no longer afraid of that problem. When I closed it? I might have lost some watchers or viewers. But I seemed to have gained some watchers because of it. I thought I have more friends in the network would comment. I got some friends that comment but not enough. I am back for now. Just being thoughtful.
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My Figure
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Posted:May 14, 2009 10:16 pm
Last Updated:Mar 21, 2010 11:19 am
12007 Views
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It seems everytime I cam lately there is some people do not like my figure. Majority of people pay lot of compliments. I sure appreciate that. I know I am not a youngster like 20-25 years ago. I was real slim around 120 pounds. I know in my early 30's I lost weight of course back then at that time. It is has been a struggle with my weight for sure. Since in the last few years I have steadily lost weight because there was no food around or either I did not feel like eating all that much.But since my mother died I have eaten more here. Because I was with people. I know some people have commented on my stomach that was not nice on cam. I am 46 years old right now. It makes me wonder if I should cam or even make videos. But I do know majority out there like my camming. What do you think here? Just Curious.
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6
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Get A Life
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Posted:May 11, 2009 8:45 pm
Last Updated:Oct 6, 2010 12:43 pm
10520 Views
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I have been reading my emails here some today. I got one from my own network saying I should get a life. How do you get a life back that was destroyed? Maybe I should not be to personal or even in my blog or network bulletins. He mentioned to me do people really care what I write? From my emails I get lots of people care. They may not mention it so in my blog because it is personal. He apologized by the remark but still it kind of hurts. I had written on this subject before earlier but another email but he retracted and apologized. It makes me think what I am doing here again? I know I should be doing things here. The only way of doing that is to turn off my profile. But the same time it has kept me busy off of things. Everytime I read someone that has not heard from me right away. That kind of hurts too. I am not a speed demon. I have gotten my emails down some to a reasonable level. But still have a ways to go. Just kind of hurt. 
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Been Off And On The Radar
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Posted:May 10, 2009 9:37 pm
Last Updated:May 23, 2009 3:15 pm
9711 Views
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I have been on and off the radar a here a bit. Hopefully I can get back on my regular routine on HotMatch.com. You know since my mother's death it has been hard for me. It is getting easier with some support from others. But still have way lots to go. I have been trying to take it easy and not let things get to me here. So I just did not want you to think I have dissapeared just preoccupied with issues. Just a bit of news here.
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The Aftermath
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Posted:May 4, 2009 6:14 pm
Last Updated:May 18, 2009 2:41 pm
12585 Views
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I got through my mother's funeral here. I am better and getting stronger every day. But it will take time to get back where I was before. But I am doing ok here. I have been keeping busy being with other people spent sometime with family now visiting out of town. One of things I am kind of worried about my mother has a new will which was written up by attorney? Of course it states 50% between me and my sister. Another thing I guess since my sister is the executor of the estate. She can go to a judge to sell the contents and get permission to come into the house and throw me out in the street. I guess it was mentioned in the emails that went back and forth. I am trying not to worry about it. But it could happen for sure. Just have to wait and see what happens next here? I am kind of worried and anxious about it. 
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4
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My Family Tree
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Posted:May 1, 2009 11:31 am
Last Updated:May 23, 2009 3:17 pm
10772 Views
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I have been looking up my family members on the internet that dates way back in the 1800's. I can only find information on my maternal side none on my paternal side though. I had tried on my father's side but received very little information. I am not going to give up on it. Just will take more time to find. It is amazing what you can on the internet. For all I know I got relatives all over the world. Just wondering they could be watching me and not know we are related. Just a thought here more than anything else.
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The Day Has Finally Arrived
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Posted:Apr 24, 2009 10:29 pm
Last Updated:May 23, 2009 3:17 pm
11709 Views
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Well tomorrow is my mother's service. I do not know what to expect guess I will have to find out? Their will be grieving,angry, and upset people there. The emails have been still flying around back and forth. I only responded twice here myself. People can be so mean at times. I think my sister and brother in law is one of them. They kept drudging the past and bringing up stuff that could hurt others. I never seen anything like it. I have been stressed out for quite awhile even before my mother's passing. Now I am even more stressed out it is worse because of all this email exchanging. My brother in law sent me a copy of my mother's last will. It seems he has full control over my sister and she is just following it. But only my sister will be control of ever thing including the contents in my house. My Dad's will left everything to me including the contents. Anyways just getting my feelings out here. I hope things will be civil through the service. There will be a obituary of my mother in both papers tomorrow. Just feeling a little anxious and uncomfortable.
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The Twittering
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Posted:Apr 19, 2009 10:34 am
Last Updated:May 23, 2009 3:20 pm
10013 Views
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I have signed up at Twitter so if anyone has a account wants to follow me they can do so here. I have the same id as here. You can google it should pop up. It will be something new for me here to do. I will be writing short things into it. Just being informational.
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Spending Time With A Loved One
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Posted:Apr 15, 2009 9:17 pm
Last Updated:May 23, 2009 3:21 pm
11499 Views
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I think it is important to spend time with your loved ones. It could be your family or close friends. Especially your parents here you do not know how long they will be on this earth. I know my dad use to tell my mother here."Don't you want to spend some quality time with your ." Of course she use to say sure I do here. Sometimes within your family there could be discord so that is understandable. But maybe you should think about getting along with them even though it is hard. But if you do have a loving relationship within your family spend that time with them. Even with that special someone should be given time to be with here. So consider what you do in life it may effect you later on? Just writing down my thoughts here as I see it.
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May You Always Feel Loved
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Posted:Apr 11, 2009 9:46 am
Last Updated:Mar 22, 2010 10:35 pm
9830 Views
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May you always feel loved
May you find serenity and tranquility
in a world you may not always understand.
May the pain you have known
and the conflict you have experienced
give the strength to walk through life
facing each new situation
with optimism and courage.
Always know that there are those
whose love and understanding
will always be there
even when you feel most alone.
May you discover enough goodness in others
to believe in a world of peace.
May a kind word,a reassuring touch
a warm smile,be yours every day of your life,
and may you give these gifts as well as receive them.
Remember the sunshine when the storm seems unending.
Teach love to those who know hate,
and let the love embrace you as you go into the world.
May the teaching of those you admire
become part of you,
so that you may call upon them.
Remember,those whose lives you have touched
and who have touched yours are always a part of you,
evein if the encounters were less
May you not become to concerned
with material matters but instead place
immeasurable value on the goodness in your heart.
Find time in each day to see the beauty
and love in world around you.
Realize that each person has limitless abilities,
but each of us in different in our own way.
What you may feel you lack in one regard
may be more than compensated for in another.
What you you lack in the present
may become one of your strenghts in the future.
May you see your future
as one filled with promise and possiblity
Learn to view everything
as a worthwhile experience.
May you find enough inner strength
to determine your own worth by yourself,
and not dependent on another's judgements
of your accomplishments.
May you always feel loved.
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1
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The Time Has Come
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Posted:Apr 8, 2009 8:30 pm
Last Updated:Apr 19, 2009 9:38 am
10602 Views
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Well I talked about closing my blog to friends only in earlier postings in my blog. I am not sure when this will occur. But I think it will happen soon. I have some watchers here that are not in the network. So I am not sure on how it will effect them? I hate to loose them. I do not really want to close my blog here because want it open for everyone. But there are those I am not sure about here. It is concerning relatives looking in my blog that I am worried most about here. I do not really want to turn off my profile right now. So the best alternative is to close my videos and blog for friends only. I already have put my videos on friends only but not the blog here yet. I am in a quaundry and mixed about this here. I cannot think of anything else to do. I am not doing it right away here. But if you do get a screen for be a freind of me in order to view my blog. Then you know why here? Just being comtemplative and worried.
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4
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The Interest Groups
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Posted:Apr 6, 2009 1:23 pm
Last Updated:Apr 30, 2009 9:05 pm
9729 Views
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You know I know I joined some groups here to stay busy or to help out others here. To those who have been nice to me and really welcomed me into their groups. I appreciate it. But to those I want to mention here has banned me for some reason. There have been only two here so far one was for blings and the other was for military. I am not going into specific of the groups. The one for the military said she wanted only military in her group. Which was fine with me? But to me I think it is being near sighted. I could of helped her out by getting more people in her group but no she decided not too. Then the other one for blings. I am not sure what happen? She wrote me a email welcoming. But then somehow I could not get into it. I did nothing wrong. I have been waiting for a response but none so far. No I had one particular group here keeps denying me everyonce in a while. I have no idea what I did here either. So I have had some good experiences and some not so good. One of these days I will be putting a group of my own but not right now. At least I know I will not have any trouble with my group. Just being thoughtful and contemplative.
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To link to this blog (roxy54sexy) use [blog roxy54sexy] in your messages.
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