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Back in the day... we called that dating.  So why try to avoid an emotional attachment? What's wrong with feelings? With proper and regular communication, those are two of the most important things about a FWB relationship!
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You know you really should heed the advice of the woman who told you , "It's called dating". AND yes, "Dating" is sexual. [If]No sex, then you're hanging out, not "Dating". .......BUT.... this doesn't mean you can not hangout [no sex] sometimes. However, if you find you are hanging out with a woman all the time [no sex], then the woman has tricked you into being "Friendzoned". I've come to the realization that it's hard to find what I'm looking for when I can't even define what that is. ... Well....there's your problem. Define it first, then look for it. What I'm really looking for is a Friend With Benefits type of relationship. ....Okay...are you sure, because you just said you got no clue. .... so to do the fwb situation, you first need a woman who is sexually attracted to you, but doesn't want a commitment , and all the rest of the clingy stuff you don't want, either. Don't put so much emphasis on being friends first... .being friends first, doesn't work. Too easy to get slid into the friendzone, being friends first. After having sex once or twice, she changes her mind, tells you she still wants to be friends..... and there you are , her token gay buddy giving her attention but you don't get sex anymore.....So , sexual attraction first, act on the attraction, with a mutual agreement of wanting nothing serious. But of course, with any personal sexual situation with someone, feelings start to play ping-pong in her head, after awhile.... maybe yours, too. Not everything revolves around sex..... You say "Everything" rather ambiguously. If you're attracted to the woman, wanting to have sex with her is natural. All that's left is working out the terms and conditions of the "Togetherness". I actually like getting out, but it gets rather boring getting out by myself. .... Don't be so quick to declare that you're bored, and so wanting the company of a woman. That's not a good way to attract a woman. Also, this time alone is absolute freedom for you, don't take it for granted, so don't think you need to change that due to boredom sometimes. Billions of guys have figured they're bored, and need to find a woman for sex and doing stuff... this develops, they get married... they get divorced, she takes him to the cleaners and he's out all kinds of money because once upon a time he got a little lonely or bored. But is that something that "FWB" people do? ... They can, but the concept of fwb is actually "Being there for each other when either one of them cannot get any dates [dry spell, no sex]. You and some women [more than one fwb would be better] are basically agreeing to supply sex when a date can not be found. "She", your fwb, will be "Dating" and seeing other guys. So obviously the fwb situation is NOT monogamous. So the necessity of having more than one fwb would be best. Or are those the kinds of things that only people in serious relationships do?....Hanging out and dating? Yes. But from what your blog has said so far...you may not be ready for a serious relationship. I don't know. I've done some of those things with my friend friends..... Sure , with your male buddies, and with women who have friendzoned you, that's common enough. The problem of course is trying to avoid an emotional attachment. I am always going to have an emotional connection- I cannot turn off my emotions..... Yes, and that's what sinks your battleship, and before you know it, she has dumped you, or you and her are getting serious. I can bottle them, but that's not always the best course of action. The problem then becomes developing feelings. .... Cross that bridge when you come to it. So the risk of developing feelings for someone who has shared intimacy with is a real possibility. ... At your age you should have a better handle on this . I was asked what was wrong with just looking for a casual hookup..... The answer to that is , "Nothing is wrong with looking for a casual hookup".... not friends, not buddies, not romance. It is rather hard to look for that sort of encounter when almost all the profiles I look at say they aren't looking for a one time thing. ... So maybe you are on the wrong kind of site. Look for websites that specifically advertise "Hookups" , like when a young buck wants older women, he should go to the "Cougar" sites.... because that is specific to what the young buck wants. Women don't want to be a 5-minute cum receptacle..... Well some do, but they are taken quickly, and have lots of "Favorite" men . I never thought anyone did, unless they were being paid by the hour. ... No... there are women who think of sex just like men do. They want it, they get it, they send you home. Perhaps that's the only way I'll ever find someone willing to teach me (and I really do have a lot to learn)..... True... hire a professional, have her tell you some tips..... nothing wrong with that. But this is something you should have done around age 18 to 28, but never too late. What you need to be cautious of, is being too eager to jump into the arms of the first woman who smiles kindly at you and gives you what you need. Be careful. You can get really messed up being too eager.
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I spent that time doing a tour in the service, tech school, and starting my career. ...Yes, so ? Lots of men do that, but they still found the time to get laid [date] [get some tail and go back to the books or whatever]. And I never considered "hiring a professional" because it's illegal, except in rural Nevada......As I said... it's never too late.
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I was also fairly staunchly Catholic. ..... So you're talking in the past tense. That means you can go to Nevada, and bang some chicks. I grew up with the teaching that sex was for marriage and dating was a way to determine if you were going to get married..... If you're still under the influence of religious nonsense, then sex is still for the married, and it's not "Dating", it's "Courting". "Courting" [no sex before marriage] is what a man does, to determine if the woman is proper enough for him.
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