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Blogs > rm_jackpot20073 > What the hell?

Done!  

rm_jackpot20073 56F
96 posts
6/23/2010 6:55 pm

Last Read:
3/4/2013 2:46 pm
Done!

I think I'm pretty much done. The guys I have met here lately have NO IDEA what a gentleman is. It's amazing. They think I'm going to invite them to my place to "fuck" without even meeting them first??? Are they insane??? They don't even have an iceberg's chance in hell with me. The one man i did meet and fall in love with from this site has done nothing but lie to me for almost 3 years. Started the day we met. The day we met, he told me he would be divorced within 6 months. That was almost 3 years ago and he is still married. He says he STEP needs his health insurance. BULLSHIT!!! Let her MOTHER provide health insurance. Hell, she's 21. Let her get a job and get it for herself. What a crock of shit. He just wants a piece of ass waiting wherever his job takes him. And he's out in California for a week "visiting his and working". Another crock. He may be visiting his and possibly working, but he is with his WIFE as well. When I asked if he was going to get divorced while out there, he emphatically said no. I may not be here when he gets back and I told him that. He never texted me back. Didn't care or too busy with his wife, I guess. Why should I be here for him? He is just using me. I never really saw it until a couple months ago. I never wanted to. Now I find it so hard to believe anything he says. I guess there's really nothing left. The sex is definitely not as good as it once was. The feelings are gone. He was never my "most greatest" lover, but being in love with him made the sex that much better. Now, it's not. All that's left are his lies and my jealousy. I was never jealous until I caught him cheating. That broke it all to hell for me. It's time I move on. So why am I finding it so hard to finally end it? I have a million times in my head, just can't bring myself to actually do it. WHY??? Could I be that desperate???Do I have that little self-esteem??? Find an honest man. That is so hard to find these days. I truly believe everyone lies now. I don't believe anyone anymore. I used to and all it got me was hurt. There's no point anymore. I am a very open and honest person and I expect the same from people in my life. Just so hard to find an HONEST GENTLEMAN these days. This site is probably not the place for me. I understand it is a sex site, but guys can be gentlemen about it. Treat me with the respect I deserve. Is that really too much to ask for? The quality of people has gone downhill. There are a few decent people, but they are far and few between--just like in all aspects of life. And if that's the case, then what's the point? There is none. Not anymore.

I lost my job about a month and a half ago. I am down to my last $100.00 and obviously won't be able to cover the rent. Unemployment doesn't even cover the rent each month--never mind the other bills. The way I see it, I have 3 choices. Be homeless and live out of my car. Move down to Florida and live off my brother until I find a job. Or suicide. Living in my car is a last resort. If I move with my brother, 95% of my possessions will end up in the dumpster because all I have is a car to move with. And I will never see him again. There is no Naval base near where my brother lives and God knows he would never be bothered to make the effort. I'm not worth it. Maybe that would be a good thing. A new start without him. However, there's always the wonderful thing called technology. How can I get over him completely if I see him every day online. He has told me twice he has deleted his profile here. Another lie. I HATE technology. HATE IT!!! I wish there was never anything like it. I would have never met him. Never caught him with other women. Of course, if he didn't want to get caught, he should have never left such wonderful testimonials about them for me to find. "Google, baby, google". That was the beginning of the end.


My idea of "help from above" is a sniper on the roof!!!
rm_747me 48M
6 posts
6/24/2010 4:08 pm

 some men just straight out suck and ruin it for the good ones


rm_jackpot20073 56F
155 posts
6/24/2010 5:43 pm
    Quoting rm_747me:
    some men just straight out suck and ruin it for the good ones
You are more than right. I feel bad for the good ones. Its understandable why they are a dying breed.


My idea of "help from above" is a sniper on the roof!!!


rm_ISORareGem 60F
8183 posts
7/2/2010 4:06 pm

 I gave up on dating here because they acted like animals. But I have realized how much more I get out of this site, from the blogs and magazine.

Don't expect a prince to show up immediately- here or in the real world. Think of it this way- he is being prepared for you, and when the time is right, you will meet.

Suicide is never an option. Get yourself into counseling. Start attending a local church, they have all sorts of stuff going on all the time. Check out the meetup site and you will find another way to meet people and network.

If your brother doesn't have a big enough place for your stuff, find storage.

there are other options. Pray.

be strong, it will all work out.
what the world needs now..........


sodja69 48M

7/11/2010 9:06 am

 I think that you should get to know someone before you actually hook up, great idea in today's society. Take your time and the right person will find you. People are judgmental and if they have an issue with meeting prior, then things are probably not what they seem.


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