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My anaconda don't want none
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My anaconda don't want none For , decades now really , I thought that the song "Baby Got Back" was actually titled "Baby Stay Back" and was a song warning women with large posteriors to stay away from Sir Mix-A-Lot's pet anaconda for their own safety . As my buddy Sassy Mo explained to me today that's not what it's about at all . What I fool I've been . so embarrassed . As sure you all know the song is actually a layman's explanation of Winifred Scott's proposed Union Army strategy for defeating the Confederacy by blockading southern ports and seizing control of the Mississippi - which became known as the Anaconda Plan . As Sir Mix-A-Lot said in an 1993 interview with The Granite Tower "The Atlantic and Gulf blockade are an important part of the history of the civil war that don't get a lot of attention in school , I just hope with this song I can help people better understand some of the important features of that conflict . A conflict which still effects our country today , a conflict with far reaching impact . " In my defense though I DID know that Nikki Minaj's song "Anaconda" is a subtle breakdown of the Vicksburg Campaign which was in many ways the culmination of the Anaconda Plan and the turning point in the war . Take the lyric "Come through and fuck him in my automobile" for instance , that is clearly a reference to December 29 assault on Walnut Hills in the Chickasaw Bayou . And of course we all know that the Lake Providence Expedition is the inspiration for the line 'Say he don't like 'em boney, he want something he can grab' . What do you think Jennifer "J-Lo" Lopez was thinking when she wrote the song "Booty" ? I assume like most successful recoding "artists" she was thinking "cha-ching !" but I like to pretend that when she was crafting that masterpiece of lyricism that she thought she was taking an important stance about the objectification of women . Speaking of , have you see that porn star that Jimmy Garappolo is banging ?  She's a full figured gal . In many of the pictures I've seen she looks like a giant but she's only 5'4 - I guess she must just hang out with shorties all the time . not a big fan of adults being called "Jimmy" or "Johnny" or "Danny" or things of that nature , but I have to say Jimmy seems right for a dude banging a porn star . As you all know I often make the claim that men and women aren't really that different , a claim that some call "dangerously insane" , but I admit that there are some differences . Such as , the other day these group of women were drooling over this handsome fellow and then his ran into the scene and he was picking them up and playing with them and doing dad stuff and that turned it from a drooling situation into a "high tide" situation . If you know what I mean . And I feel like you do . And yet , at least speaking for myself , when ogling a sexy lady and then I find out she has my reaction is always "oh , bummer" . There's one other difference too , I never have , and probably will never have had , knocked on the bathroom door when someone is in there and asked if everything is okay . That is by a wide margin one of the most mystifying female behaviors I've observed . I can imagine NO good outcome from that question . I mean what are going to do if the answer is "No , please come in here and help me" ? Nevermind , I don't want to know . Putting first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first. |
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I want cake Putting clients first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put clients (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first.
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You have sisters and you don't KNOW that the phrase "Is everything okay?" is a euphemism for "Hurry the f*ck up, I have to pee!" *shakes head, sadly* Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!
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Aaah yes, the sexy dad syndrome - it's even a trope in advertising. You have a point, even guys who are into MILF's, it definitely doesn't seem to be about the fact that they have kids.  
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Heh, Pop Daddy popcorn? I was thinking more something like this...not that YOU would be interested in seeing this, seeing as you're heterosexual and kids aren't a point of attraction for you: [image]
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