A PUBLISHERS Call To Arms (and Legs, and Lips, and tongues, and oh nevermind)
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Posted:Apr 30, 2005 4:36 pm
Last Updated:Sep 27, 2015 9:34 am
17321 Views
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Grrr, those N A Z I blog police have prevented me from posting in my own blog again.
No matter, their puny efforts to stifle me are as tiny pimples on an elephant's ass. The voices of Blogland are lifting up and shaking the powers that CONTROL us all.
(control they may think they have at present; we are only now emerging as a force in our own right).
My friends, history shows us that when the cry of the people becomes united in a single voice, those in POWER are forced to listen.
The AFriendFinder TATTLER can be a vehicle for all of us to use as we make our voices HEARD! Heard by all the BEST women and men on this site, er, I ah mean heard by the folks in charge of this place. Yeah, that was it... those guys.
My fellow BlogLanders! Hear me! When we are UNITED many of us cannot stand. It is easier when laying down so let us UNITE!
And if, (Oh! Let it not be so), if we are to divide and fall; then let us all fall into a pile together and remain UNITED!
BlogLanders, as your (self-proclaimed) prophet I give you a WARNING!
There is indeed some serious funny biznis occurring in our fair Land of Blog, and it is not an imaginary RUSE as some have proclaimed.
It is all of it a true farce, er, a true FACT I mean to say. There is indeed a LURKER among us. I am very near to being able to prove that this mischief is being caused by a devious but deteriorating mind.
It is a mind in conflict with itself and that makes it even more dangerous. With the assistance of my loyal and comfortably clever cub reporter BLONDENEEDSSEX , I have been able to isolate this menace.
Very SOON I will have him in a corner he will be MINE!
He is most certifiably mad, maD, MAD! and if anyone can STOP him it is I,
The PUBLISHER
NYAH, AH, AH
And to you oh foolcantcook or whatever moniker you are using these days, I issue you a PERSONAL warning through the words of your idol FZ...
"Your mind is totaly controlled, it has been shaped to fit our mold, and you will do as you are told until the rights to you are SOLD! "
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From The Publishers Private Notebook
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Posted:Apr 29, 2005 7:50 am
Last Updated:Sep 27, 2015 9:34 am
17303 Views
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I am helping to edit Blonde's upcoming book release titled All The Blogmakers Responders where Deep Throat plays a very prominent role. This person has been invaluable in alerting me to the funny biznis going on in BLOGLAND.
It seems that not only is there a LURKER present in our little world, there is an entity that is much MUCH more dangerous.
This entity is truly odd and deranged. It is becoming increasingly apparent that he is not entirely in control of his own mind.
I have noticed several conflicting personalities emerging from this single source. With so many different voices it is becoming impossible to forecast his next move.
Uncontrolled voices are the most dangerous ones in a controlled atmosphere and result in anarchy and chaos.
The blog police may not be here for our benefit entirely. I had hoped that they would assist me when I was attacked by the Lurker, but I was left to deal with it alone. They have their own agenda, and tactics must be developed to circumvent them and promote free expression.
The AFriendFinder TATTLER can become a platform for developing our pubescent community and rallying the community to a common cause...
... LURING NEW READERS TO OUR BLOGS!
I must find a way to promote the infant blogging group being organized by GoddessOfTheDawn , [blog sexyfitwoman] , and others. There must be some method of doing this. Hmmm, perhaps a news story on it. Now if only I can get some of the staff columnists to write a few for their blogs. mygmyg , [blog mi] , postingnick , [blog Mnfun] and others who volunteer may be of some use.
Tala must be found. Without his good humor inspiring my day I find myself listless and lost.
My cub reporter Blonde , has been doing such a fine job she must be rewarded. note to self: begin a file with ideas that will keep her satisfied and beaming.
Lastly, I must put an end to this Lurker fellow once and for all. I have blogs I want to visit when this is over.
The PUBLISHER
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Controversy Emerging In Blogland! TATTLER Exclusive!
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Posted:Apr 26, 2005 8:55 pm
Last Updated:Sep 27, 2015 9:33 am
17479 Views
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................AFriendFinder TATTLER....................
BREAKING NEWS!!!
A Lurker is among us!
Yes friends and readers it is my unfortunate duty to inform y'all that some of us are being stalked in our blogs.
Read the details in Blonde's blog.
In another but so far unrelated story another fraud appears to be emerging in Blogland.
A person who is much more than they appear to be to all of us in Blogland. See up to the minute reports in BLONDENEEDSSEX's blog.
.................AFriendFinder TATTLER.....................
Public Service Announcement
Unexpected departure opens seat in DominantsRUs School of Pleasure and Pain
Hmm, now I am being suppressed by Big Brother! The news must flow!
Dang, rejected again. Maybe this will help...
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From The Publishers Private Notebook
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Posted:Apr 25, 2005 9:40 pm
Last Updated:Aug 25, 2015 7:19 pm
17293 Views
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Aha! I must get this to BLONDENEEDSSEX ASAP!
Since she is in charge of Investigative and Invasive Reporting I will instruct her to begin the rumor here. If this devious plan works out This is a SCOOP in the making. A perfect story to validify my rag!
(Haven't heard of it? It is called the AFriendFinder TATTLER. )
It appears that another photo swap controversy is about to strike the blogosphere. I can see my HEADLINE now:
xxxxxx FOUND TO HAVE SPLIT PERSONALITY!
evidence presented by an unnamed, unconfirmed, anonymous, shadowy, slanderous and unreliable source proves that xxxxxx also is masquerading as a (fill in gender) "with a lot to love".
As soon as he/she finds the lost contact lens and turns back around to face the camera we will have the shot of the century! This will sell more papers than I had ever dreamed possible!
I must hurry to BLONDENEEDSSEX so we can turn this lie into a
rumor and then build it into a scandal. Perhaps we can EVEN bring down one of the Powerhouses of Blogging.
That is certain to sell some papers.
(Hmmm, I must send this over to nightstogether PRONTO! He will know best whether or not this type of tactic could work in the political arena...)
PS:
xxxxxx, something is going on in your blog. When I entered your xxxxxx post I surprised that Lurker dude. He ran me over in his rush to escape and now I have footprints starting at my ankles and runninig up my legs. He ground his heel in my groin (note to self: Have Barbiebunny expel him from that dang school of hers. ) Then he proceeded up my body and left toe prints on my forehead!
If there are truly blog police on this site like so many posters have said I need them now.
A crime has been committed! In xxxxxx's post! The perpetrater is loose! Call those goddam blog police NOW!
(OMG! Crime sells too! Especially when it is local. Another story is forming in my brain! This here rag is headed right to the top)!
he's mad, maD, MAD I tell you!
BLONDENEEDSSEX CONTACT ME ASAP SO I CAN GIVE YOU THIS LEAD. You will find this clue in one of the local Bloggers posts. We must act quickly.
This exclusive information comes from none other than our good friend Deep Throat who as usual has requested to remain anonymous.
(we will expose that person as soon as readership and sales begin to dwindle)
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EXTRA! EXTRA! Read All About It!
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Posted:Apr 24, 2005 2:55 pm
Last Updated:May 13, 2014 6:57 pm
17710 Views
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First of all they need a mood called "creative" on their list. My post follows:
We have a community here now don’t we? Well, a community needs a newspaper and I have decided to publish one. It is called The A friend finder Tattler and will be delivered to your desktop very soon. I am still tweaking my staffing wish list so bear with me. These are some of my ideas so far…
The opening headline of the first edition of this new rag will be:
MAN PUTS HEAD IN ASS IN GREENIES BLOG!
Details Inside!
Perhaps in the Living section you will find…
Is Anal For You?
Another Frank Sexual Discussion from sexyfitwoman’s Daily Column on health and lifestyles.
In the political section you might see articles such as…
Tactics For Increasing Influence By A National Majority Party In A Province Where It Is In The Minority.
Essay by nightstogether.
Of course the Poetry Column will be edited by GoddessOfTheDawn.
The Sports Section should be run by sportyforfun without a doubt. Mainly because he can climb buildings and the name fits perfectly anyway. Women’s Sports will be in Mackey’s charge.
The Family Page will be the domain of mzhunyhole.
Inside this section are delightful ideas for spicing up life while raising a family.
On the Lighter Side the unquenchable Tala will have you in stitches!
Stories and musings from a younger perspective go to RickHunter in Today’s Youth.
Alternative Lifestyles is reserved for wyvernrose. And papy.
Adventure and World Travel will include columns edited by expatbrit. Hold onto your hats folks, he will take you places you have never been!
Bella gets the Scandal Section
Arts & Crafts is headed by Almondnut.
On the Editorial Page there are many wonderful and creative columnists discussing subjects of unlimited variety.
For frank, honest, and in your face discussion refer to mygmyg, postingnick, mnfun, mi_mwpm, and many more.
I have tons of writers in mind for these jobs, and more will present themselves in the time to come.
Of course this rag will need advertisers so I need some suggestions from all of y’all…my potential subscribers.
For beginners I would like to get the Barbiebunny account.
I envision an ad something like this:
(picture of Barbie in black leather, spiked heel placed on the back of a naked Adonis with full shot of bent knee and sexy thigh)
DominantsRUs School of Pleasure and Pain Experience the humbling feeling of being squashed like a bug by 9” heels! Enrollments still available!
(I have other ideas and other roles but I am weary with creating this paper for now and need to rest….)
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Acts I Have Witnessed
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Posted:Apr 24, 2005 11:35 am
Last Updated:Jun 2, 2023 2:47 pm
15454 Views
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Trying to remember concerts I have been to.
Highlighted bands were some of the best
Bonnie Raitt (bunches of times) , Allman Bros. (8x), Roxy Music, Natalie Cole, Jackson Browne, Greatful Dead , Deep Purple, Buddy Miles, Frank Zappa (4x) , Brian Setzer, Spirit, Emerson, Lake, & Palmer (2x), Alice Cooper(2x), Doc Watson (bunches of times) , Juice Newton, The Turtles, Led Zeppelin (2x), Gary Lewis and the Playboys, King Crimson, Huey Lewis and the News, The Kinks, Rod Stewart and Faces , Lynyrd Skynyrd, Pink Floyd , America, Jimmy Buffet, John Prine, ZZ Top, Stephen Stills, Heart, Linda Ronstadt, Uriah Heep (2x), Black Sabbath with Ozzie Osbourne , Willie Nelson, Emmy Lou Harris, The Four Tops, The Beach Boys, The Band, The Eagles, Billy Joel, Sade, David Allen Coe, The Crusaders, Dwight Yokum, Jethro Tull, B.B. King, Albert King, Dr. John, Meatloaf , Stevie Nicks, Alabama(6x), George Thoroughgood, Chuck Berry, Santana, Traffic, George Mason, War, Steppenwolf, Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, Ricky Scaggs, Miami Sound Machine, Eric Clapton, Ronnie Montrose, Joe Walsh, Hall & Oates, Doobie Bros., The Judds, Rickie Lee Jones, Blue Oyster Cult, Robin Trower, Todd Rundgren, Bruce Springsteen, JJ Cale, Focus, Electric Light Orchestra, New Riders of the Purple Sage, Poco, Hot Tuna, Dixie Dregs, Carly Simon, Harry Nilsson, Leon Russell, Supertramp, John Luc Ponty, Jerry Jeff Walker, Bee Gees, Joni Mitchell… There are probably more, but I haven’t remembered them yet…
Shows That I Could Have Seen But Missed (and that makes me mad)
Bette Midler, The Rolling Stones, Frank Sinatra, Yes, The Who, Bob Dylan, Annie Lennox, Paul Simon, Phoebe Snow, Stevie Ray Vaughn, Alison Kraus, Queen, The Pretenders, Blondie, Neil Diamond, James Taylor, The Monkees, Jimi Hendrix, Neil Young, David Bowie, Talking Heads, Joan Osbourne, Genesis, Prince, 10cc, Leo Kottke, Manhattan Transfer, Alan Parsons Project, Steely Dan, Warren Zevon, The Oak Street Boys, Elvis …
Shows That Never Came My Way But I Really Hate That I Missed
The Beatles, Barbara Streisand, Aretha Franklin, Ella Fitzgerald, Louie Armstrong, Patty Labelle, Patsy Cline, Carole King, Bob Marley…
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Role Reversal
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Posted:Apr 23, 2005 10:20 pm
Last Updated:May 15, 2014 12:14 pm
15296 Views
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Many of y'all have been reading greeneyesatl05 blog where she publishes the letters that hapless men are writing her.
I was reading in there and it struck me. What would it be like if the women here wrote us letters like that?
Telling us how hard they could make us cum. Or the tightness of their pussies and their muscle control, etc.?
And what if they did it by the hundreds? With poor grammer and woeful bragging and corny pick up lines.
It wouldn't take me long to begin posting like our greenie. But I would probably want to "sample" some of them too. (just to see if they looked as bad as they wrote). 
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Flowers Ad Nauseum
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Posted:Apr 23, 2005 4:10 pm
Last Updated:May 13, 2014 7:59 am
13514 Views
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The ongoing saga of keith's desk continues.
BarbieBunny gave me the obvious advice and I have replaced the dead ones with some new ones. Much less exotic, but hopefully more durable.
Also, maybe this pic will work too. I made sure that nothing on my desk was visible. (I think they denied my other ones from the earlier blog because my desktop was so messy.
Now, enough of these "fluff blogs". I need to get down to buisness.
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Flowers On My Desk Revisited
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Posted:Apr 22, 2005 2:16 pm
Last Updated:May 13, 2014 7:58 am
13498 Views
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Oh Dear! I have slain them! They sucked up 3 cups of water while I was at work. By the time I got home they were beginning to wilt. I re-cut them and hoped for the best.
Yesterday, they died.
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Frank Zappa says...
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Posted:Apr 22, 2005 1:24 pm
Last Updated:Jun 2, 2023 2:58 pm
13422 Views
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A lot of things wrong with society today are directly attributable to the fact that the people who make the laws are sexually maladjusted.
from "I Seem To Be a Verb" by R. Buckminster Fuller, 1970.
I think there is some validity to that statement.
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Fraud!
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Posted:Apr 21, 2005 10:33 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
13347 Views
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So what? I enjoyed the blog that Bella wrote. I still wish she would reappear.
In fact, she just may do it under a new pseudonym. I may stumble upon that style of writing in a new blog sometime in the future.
I also am enjoying the controversy created by this. Blogland needed some spicing up...
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I Just Got The News
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Posted:Apr 21, 2005 5:28 pm
Last Updated:May 8, 2014 7:23 pm
12782 Views
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A great writer has put down her pen and the blog area of this site will be much diminished with her absence.
Good bye Bella.
PS I hope this is one of those 'American sports stars' types of retirement. If so, hopefully the "comeback" is just around the bend...
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To link to this blog (keithcancook) use [blog keithcancook] in your messages.
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