the Phoenix
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Posted:Jun 11, 2009 7:08 pm
Last Updated:Jun 14, 2009 8:42 pm
13681 Views
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So many times my head feels like it should implode
and I wonder why I stop it from doing that
Too many demands
Too many needs
Too many people wanting more than there is to take
thinking about themselves
so much more than others
The ones that hurt the most
are those with an agenda
with a motive
with a plan
Those don't care who they hurt
or step on
or devastate
They leave little piles of ash
when they are finished with their games
I'm tired of being the Phoenix
Just once
I'd like to be beautiful
without having to rise again.
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8
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checking
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Posted:Jun 1, 2009 8:10 pm
Last Updated:Jun 28, 2009 8:22 pm
13941 Views
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WoW...
It's terribly amazing how many times someone will check your blog
Even when nothing new has been posted.
Is that Obsessive compulsive?
Or stalking?
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11
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Morrigan
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Posted:May 22, 2009 5:11 am
Last Updated:May 28, 2009 8:09 pm
14073 Views
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Searching long lost emails, I found this little story in my archives. I hope the one i wrote it for wont be angry at my posting! ENJOY!
Once again he find himself driven to the clearing, deep in the woods, far from his home. He knows she will be right here. His heart finds itself racing toward her even quicker than his car can maneuver the terrain. Finally the place comes upon him and John directs his vehicle to the side, turning off its engine. Hesitating, wondering if his memory holds true, he ponders calling on her again. As his eyes begin trying to adjust to the darkness he steps from the car, searching the pastures borders for a glimpse of the vixen his heart draws him to. Straining in the blackness, he realizes nothing is there but the sounds of night and the coolness of the air. "Morrigan......?" he haltingly whispers, in hopes that she will answer. "Please Morrigan....please be here."
At the far side of the clearing, movement catches his eye and the night stars begin to reflect from her figure in the dark. The moonlit figure moves close to him and he knows her feet are barely touching the wet grass. His vision begins to focus more clearly and John can make out the features he has so passionately craved for.
Long flowing white gown, fabric gently wafting in the night breeze shimmering across her body like a mist. Long red tresses cascade from her shoulders and her piercing green eyes are clearly visible in the darkness. This beauty in the night has but one oddity surrounding her - the chain-mail vest of armour and the sword at her side, reminding him of the battles she not only watches over, but causes victors to lose merely at her own whim. The metal honed to perfection glistens in the dark and her obvious power in this world and the other forces him to bow his head before her. Moonlight is drawn to her and a most unnatural glow surrounds her in the night.
"John...." she offers, as his eyes hesitate to meet hers. "You must stop summoning me, Dearest man...." Morrigan finds herself struggling with their meeting, yet she allows herself to make it happen.
Moving slowly to her, eyes locking, John's passion for the vixen can be felt as the gap between them grows smaller. Reaching for her, as he has done so many times before, he touches her side gently. Armour and lace are present here and his hand slides behind her to pull her in to him. Their bodies contact roughly as he looks down at her face and knows that she is his One. Regardless of whether they share the same world or not, his desire becomes stronger at the feel of her contours melting into his body.
Leaning into her hair, shining in the moonlight, he nuzzles her ear. "Morrigan you belong to me..." he hisses. His deep voice produces electricity thru her spine at his possession of her. As her arms begin to encircle his back, he knows that she would never admit her defeat, yet willing allows it to happen with each meeting of theirs.
Slowly...methodically John begins to strip her of her armour. Heavy vest is thrown to the ground and her sword is carefully placed attop his vehicle. Once devoid of her war equipment, her beauty radiates to its fullest, and his love responds equally. Hesitating to release the control she has been assigned, she feels her soul relaxing into his arms once more, as he nuzzles her neck. Finding that spot, needing to show his desire, he first kisses, then nips causing her to press into him further.
"John......" escapes from her lips as His mouth moves down to the swell of her breast above her gown. John delights in playfully kissing and tugging at her flesh. She knows her nipples have hardened already as his mouth moves towards one, not moving the fabric, but teasing her thru it. "Will you give in Morrigan?" he questions, as his hand steadies her from behind and his mouth torments her from the front.
"John, this can never be.." Morrigan fights to regain composure and quickly realizes that the point of going back has been crossed.
Straightening to her, he holds her chin to look into her eyes, searching for the place where their souls can become one. John once again captures her lips and she opens her mouth without hesitation to accept his kiss.
Slipping his hands to her shoulders, he slides the fabric from them and it falls to the ground like water. Naked before him he continues to kiss her deeply, while his hands begin their exploration of her perfection. Caressing her breasts with one hand and sliding across her buttocks with the other provokes a moan from her and he knows she is his. Teasing her from behind, he strokes along the juncture of her legs, and wetness flows from her core. John can feel her legs parting slightly as his fingers caress her there and he teases the opening unmercifully. Pulling away to quickly remove his own clothing gives Morrigan enough time to regroup and come back to her senses. Taking her turn to tease, she too takes posses ion of the place on his neck, but her retribution causes the vixen to bite at him hard, leaving her mark so proudly. Her body drops with her hands trailing behind it, Morrigan works her way down, grinning up at him when he finally can offer his eyes to open. Knowing his cock has been hard from her first site, she passes it up and slowly moves from the bottom upward, in order to nuzzle his ball with her nose. Air escapes his chest as she takes one, then the other into her mouth and gently sucks at them. Taking her time, teasing him as he did her, she sucks at the base of his cock while it twitches in excitement. Pausing at the head...grinning with mouth open wide, she says to him "Who belongs to who now, John?"
All that he can offer is his closing eyes, as the heat from her oral assault encompasses his entire being. Slowly she moves upon him, and her mouth is like hot silk stroking his manhood. Knowing she will bring about the end this way he grasps her shoulder and lifts her to him, grabbing at her lips with his, in effort to calm his excitement.
Moving to the grass, laying her down under himself, she can feel the wetness against her back as the dew encompasses their bodies on the ground. Struggling to slow himself, John slips between her legs with his knee, pushing against her to spread them. Grasping her nipple again in his mouth, her back arches in response and she pulls him toward her. Tugging at his buttocks, pleading with him for entry, he lays upon her body as his cock finds the entrance to her wet opening. Slowly he enters, slipping all the way in and she shudders against him in response. "John, please don't stop..." she groans as the mere presence of his hard cock bring about her orgasm. Feeling the contractions against his hardness he can no long resist and places his arms under her shoulders to hold her tightly against himself. Moving with newfound determination he thrusts into her, again and again until another wave of contractions is felt in her depths. No longer able to stop, his own orgasm shudders from deep within his soul and his seed explodes from his cock buried in her to the hilt. Panting, pulsing, he continues to rock against her...holding her tight as the waves begin to subside. Kissing his shoulder as he relaxes against her, Morrigan knows that resistance to his summoning of her will never be an issue, and each time together she needs him even more for the next.
Sleep encompasses him as he rests upon her and he begins to drift into it against her. Falling deliciously into a dream, he is not aware of how long he has been laying in grass.
His eyes slowly pull themselves open and he finds himself laying on his stomach, while the morning sun peeks above the horizon. Wet with dew, he realizes the soreness to his neck and rubs the spot tenderly. "That was the strangest dream....." he says inside his head and a soft sound makes him raise and turn to see what it is.
Standing several feet away....pulling a wing forward to clean.....a crow waits for his waking. Reaching for the bird, it reacts as it should and take to flight away from the advance. "Ok maybe this wasn't is a dream," he mumbles as John stands and watches the animal fly off. Dressing, muttering at himself for his foolishness, he returns to his car...only to find the sliver sword from the evening before.
Taking it up...swooping thru the air, he knows - soon he will return to the place and again call her name.....
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5
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It's All In How You Look At Things
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Posted:May 10, 2009 6:12 pm
Last Updated:Sep 5, 2012 3:04 pm
14161 Views
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Most of us that have been here a bit
Tend to forget that this is a "Hook-Up" site.
We come here
To read
To boost our egos
To blog
To find sex
We forget that some of the profiles
Are attached to real people
They hurt
and they laugh
and they scream
and they love
And once in a blue moon
Or better yet in a conveniently placed flood
Two members will come together
Search for compassion
Find asparagus
And enjoy life.
It's all how you look at things
My new friend
Step one:
Pull up a memory
and smile for me today
Step two:
Repeat again tomorrow
And say hello to the cows for me!
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11
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Two years ago today..re-post...Friends....
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Posted:Apr 19, 2009 6:58 am
Last Updated:Feb 21, 2010 6:25 pm
13715 Views
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Looking back into my blogs I found this post from two years ago today. Terribly fitting still today. Thank you Blogland-Friends!
So I'm writing this response to a new "Buddy" on my list...we've started emailing back and forth...and this epiphany came to me today. We were discussing the odd journey of mid-life crisis (imagine that) when I surprised myself with the following words of wisdom (all is paraphrased and hope that my new friend doesn't mind me reposting for blog-world)
I've decided not to look for the next Mr. Me (at this time in my life)...This journey is about meeting friends...and it's a journey from one friend to the next....some last but a moment...others a lifetime. Some give...others take...yet all are precious to me.
Thanks to HotMatch.com for helping me build my list of friends...and to those friends...thanks for being a part of my journey.
kisses
T.
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6
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Go Green....
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Posted:Apr 17, 2009 6:21 pm
Last Updated:May 2, 2009 5:30 am
13813 Views
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At the request of my
Our home went a bit "Greener" today.
Have at it .
(See pic)
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10
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I
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Posted:Apr 14, 2009 7:22 pm
Last Updated:Dec 6, 2009 8:10 pm
13469 Views
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I
am glad
to be alive
and to be me
even if
thats
not
enough
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4
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Sticky Buns Part II
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Posted:Apr 3, 2009 4:49 pm
Last Updated:Apr 21, 2009 3:10 am
13871 Views
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And then….it happened again.
A second kiss.
Both Tanya and Todd knew that turning back wasn’t an option anymore.
Their heart-pounding smiles wouldn’t let them.
“You have no idea how long I’ve waited for this.”
Tanya manages to pull herself away, to break free from the passion just long enough to come to her senses. Her business needs closed and the cleaning wasn’t finished. Todd knew the quicker they could finish, the quicker he could return to the “real” business at hand.
“You deserve a raise,” Tanya would mutter while she watched her employee working diligently to help her close.
“Well, with that kiss I got, I’m not so sure I didn’t already get one. I think we are even?”
With the kiss still fresh on her lips Tanya feels her face getting red with blush. She knows what she wants, and decides it’s time to act upon it.
Tanya walks towards him, placing her finger on his lip as if to shush any protesting that might come about. Slowing, all the while staring deep into Todd’s eyes, Tanya begins to remove her apron, her blouse, her clothing.
And Todd realizes he would do anything.
“Is this your way of telling me you’d like to continue our play, Boss-Lady?”
Picking up her whisk and tapping the insubordinate worker on the shoulder Tanya decides that it’s time Todd understands.
“Your work isn’t quite done Todd,” as she playfully taps the implement slightly harder against his skin.
“What do you mean?”
And he notices a change to her stare, something smoldering inside her dying to escape.
“I do believe that you are no longer my employee, Todd, more of a servant. And if you value your position, you’ll do as you are told.”
Todd felt his pulse begin to soar as he hard her words. With anxious anticipation, he went over her words looking for a clue as to what she had in store.
“And what would the Boss-Lady have in mind for a lowly servant like me?”
As soon as the words hit the air, Todd felt the hard hit from the whisk strike his shoulder.
“I’m not your employer now, Todd. I am your Mistress.”
Eyes wide Todd would say he was sorry for misunderstanding.
And again he would receive a smack.
“A servant never says ‘I’m sorry” He learns from his mistake and makes it right again.”
“Yes my master.”
“Very good, my pet. Now as for your duties..”
Todd felt himself dropping to his knees before the partially naked woman standing before him.
“What is it that you desire from me, Mistress?”
“Very good, my pet. You are proving to be a good quick learn.”
Looking down at Todd, Tanya smiles at the turn of event
“Now it seems that I am still wearing my pants, slave. How am I to gain satisfaction from you while I am still wearing my pants and under things?”
Todd nods and quickly goes about finishing the disrobing process his master had started.
“Is that better my Master?”
Tanya smiled with delight at how compliant her servant had become.
No longer to resist the beauty before him, Todd leans forward to kiss the inner thighs of his Master.
Tanya stops him with a firm scolding.
“Not yet, my pet. You haven’t shown me your worthiness yet.”
Stopping in mid-kiss, Todd nods in understanding.
“Yes my Mistress, as you wish.”
“What does she desire of me, a lowly pet?”
The mere words bring pleasure to Mistress Tanya.
“Stroke your cock for me, pet. I want to watch.”
Quickly removing its hardness from the work trousers Todd was wearing, the hardened cock springs forward for Tanya to see.
“May I please kiss and caress you, my Mistress?”
His request is met with her delight and Tanya grants the request made.
“Please me slave.”
Looking into her eyes for approval, Todd begins the slow journey of bringing his Master to a fever-pitch. Rising to his feet and looking into her eyes he sees the same desire mirrored in her.
Tanya can no longer resist his body and instructs Todd boldly to enter her waiting core…quickly.
And Todd gratefully does as he is told.
Kissing, caressing, thrusting deeply, Todd leans his mistress back over her work station.
And reaches for a bag of icing.
“Ever wonder how those cakes felt having those little tiny flowers placed upon them?”
Tanya looks at him quizzically and thinks - where is this coming from?
“What do you mean, pet?”
Slowly, delicately Todd traces an icing rosebud across her right nipple, followed by one on her left, all the while thrusting slowly in and out of Tanya’s wet puss.
“You will clean that off me slave.”
“Yes my Mistress. I’ll do anything to please you.”
Carefully timed with the thrusts of his pelvis into her, Todd slowly licks the icing from her nipples. And Tanya is finding herself begging for more.
Letting go of her senses, Tanya realizes that this is going to “work” out just fine.
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13
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Sticky Buns..part 1
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Posted:Mar 29, 2009 6:38 pm
Last Updated:Mar 31, 2009 8:01 pm
13686 Views
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Thank you my Dear Friend...for allowing me to write with you...again.
Being a single person and running your own business can be a trying course at times. Tanya could attest to this fact. She thought by owning her own bakery, her life would be complete, and yet it has proven to be terribly stressful, even if she did enjoy her work most days.
Tanya would be required to give of herself tirelessly in order to complete the demanding bakery schedule and her assistant would prove to be worth his pay in gold. On her books for merely a few weeks, Todd was a quick-learn and business had picked up since his hire.
“I’m back from delivering your buns, Boss-lady!” Todd would tease when he arrived back from a run.
He could always make Tanya smile, even if she was elbows deep in bread dough orders. She was comfortable with him and they worked well together, like a seasoned team. She found herself smiling now.
“Well Boss, it’s the weekend, and its way past closing time. What are we still doing here?”
“There are a few things that need finished before I head home, Todd. Just a matter of tying up the loose ends to get ready for next week.”
Todd could see the stress from their busy week in the tension of her shoulders. He was amazed that a single Mom with so much on her plate already would still have enough energy to “Tie up the loose ends”. He was also amazed at how beautiful she looked, with just a wisp of her hair escaping the knot she had pulled back earlier in the day.
“The jewel of the town can’t be transformed into a social butterfly if she’s slaving at her workplace, now can she? How’s bout I lend a hand so you can get the hell outta here sometime tonight?”
Even though the company and the help seemed so terribly inviting, Tanya offered a polite “No, Thanks” and focused back on her bread. “You know I can’t afford overtime Todd.”
“What’s wrong with a bit of volunteer work?”
Todd grinned as he wrapped the towel he was fidgeting with around his hand and held it in snap-mode toward her backside.
Her sly smile betrayed her and Todd knew he was given the “I dare you.”
“You tell me to go, but that twinkle in your eye let’s me know you are lying to me Boss.”
“Ok, ok. Yes, Todd I would love to have you here to help me finish up this work. Is that what you needed to hear?”
Todd becomes terribly aware of a change in Tanya’s voice. Her stress was painfully apparent and Todd wanted her to know of his genuine concern.
“Tanya, are you o.k.?” he asked.
“I’m sorry hun, yes. I guess I’m just a little overworked and stressed.”
Gently Todd reaches to take Tanya’s hand in his. Pulling her from the workbench and guiding her to a seat in the kitchen, he pushes slightly at her shoulders to make her sit for the first time that day.
“You may be my boss during regular work hours, but I am ordering you to sit now and let me do your work here. Just tell me what to do and I’ll get this done for you boss.”
A smile spreads across the tired bakers face as she realizes what a wonderful co-worker she had found in Todd. What she didn’t understand was why her heart beat just a bit quicker with his gesture. She also wasn’t sure of why she was hugging him - really hugging him.
Todd realized he was hugging her back.
And that uncomfortable moment hit the both of them in the same instant. Pulling back with reddened faces, both Todd and Tanya quickly straightened up, covering their embarrassment with a hurried pace.
With Todd at the helm, the chores were finished within the hour and all that was left was to wipe down appliances before closing. Small talk would help loosen the tension that had crept in with the prolonged hug and yet, for some reason both of them still avoided eye contact.
When Todd finally gave in and looked across at his employer, he realized that she had been sitting there watching him intently, with a white swipe of flour straight across her forehead.
“What’s so funny?”
“Well Boss,” Todd replied as he reached for the towel to wipe the smudge from her face. “I have always thought you looked rather charming, but this flour has got to go.”
Embarrassed by her overlooked messiness, her eyes trailed once again to the floor.
“No wonder I’m single and can’t find a man.”
Raising her chin, Todd gently tilts her head upward.
“Have you no idea how attractive you are Boss-Lady? I mean if I thought I wouldn’t be crossing some unwritten line, I would take you out and show you the attention you deserve.”
Tanya smiled and blushed as her heart began to beat faster at the thought of her and Todd in an environment outside of work.
Realizing he may have already crossed that line, Todd quickly stepped aside and changed the subject slightly.
“So T. You’re not going out tonight? I mean it being Saturday and all?”
Tanya's smile fades slightly with the reminder of how lonely she really was.
“No, I have no plans. I'm not really the social butterfly you make me out to be.”
“That’s such a shame. An attractive woman like you holding yourself away from the world like you are. It just seems so wrong.”
Tanya became well aware of the flirtatious sound of Todd’s voice.
“If I didn’t know any better Todd, I would think you were trying to flatter me…”
Todd found himself blushing now.
He also found himself leaning into Tanya to kiss her.
And she became aware that she was kissing him back.
Once again the two find themselves in an awkward moment, heated and stirred by a passion that neither was aware of. Breaking from the encounter, both Todd and Tanya are wide-eyed and breathing heavy.
A line had been crossed leaving them ill at ease.
And yet their faces drew close together again to share a kiss even deeper and more passionate than the first one.
To be continued…..
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7
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The List
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Posted:Mar 24, 2009 6:37 pm
Last Updated:Oct 25, 2015 7:44 pm
13891 Views
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I sometimes wonder
why I torture myself
with things I simply
cannot have.
I want what once was
and that is no longer
in existence.
Yesterday is over.
I want something more meaningful
and yet live
for the meaningless.
And wonder why
I don't get what I want.
I want companionship
and only look at
the unobtainable.
The taken.
The spoken for.
The liars.
And then piss and moan
when I don't find
anyone tangible.
I made a list once
of all the things
that the next
would never do
or have
or be.
Nobody is left
when the cuts are made.
Except me.
Alone.
Still.
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3
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sigh......
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Posted:Mar 15, 2009 12:30 pm
Last Updated:Mar 21, 2009 4:54 am
13734 Views
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We love you Dwayne.
We're gonna miss you.
I know Sherri will.
47 is way too young.
It means I could be next.
I promise we will help take care of all the ones you left.
And that awful Zeus.
He's still waiting by the window.
I'm not so sure I can handle the Iguana tho.
Sherri threw away your chips when she got home from the hospital.
And your beer too.
She doesn't know what to do right now.
And she isn't supposed to.
I know you didn't feel the same way Sherri did about God.
And I really hope He gives us all one last chance.
A chance to get right.
I was just hoping, that for her....
You put that all aside.
He won't turn His back on you, even now.
Peace my friend.
Godspeed.
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6
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Lies, Liars, and other sordid affairs.
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Posted:Mar 12, 2009 8:23 pm
Last Updated:Mar 23, 2009 8:11 pm
13047 Views
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Have you ever come to the conclusion that we, as a group, lie?
Men are liars.
Women are liars.
Most in between are liars.
I think the hardest part of any relationship is the moment you realize that a lie has been discovered. That moment becomes the essence of the word betrayal. Betrayal is a gut-wrenching feeling, and it all starts within a lie.
Do I lie...on occasion.
I would never allow Mrs. Jones, the ninety year old, sweet, frail lady to know that I could not tell she had lost three pounds or that her hair really was blue. Hurting someones feelings will cause me to tell a fib, as will trying to make someone feel better about themselves. "Mrs. Jones...that aqua colored scarf makes your face...just....uhm..beam!"
Do I try to lie....no.
My profile reflects truth, my blog portrays truth and my rather corrosive personality defends truth.
Lying is a human deficit.
We are born into it.
And yet we all know how it feels to be the victim of it.
And in that moment, when a conversation will return from memory, or things merely add up to finally make sense, is cataclysmic.
An affair is uncovered.
A friend is dismissed.
2 and 2 now equal 4.
There aren't many moments that I hate in life.
I hate that moment.
I work hard at not making that moment happen to others.
I just wish they would have the courage to make them not happen to me.
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To link to this blog (cgarten) use [blog cgarten] in your messages.
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