Sheep need not apply.
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Posted:Jan 18, 2009 11:27 am
Last Updated:Mar 30, 2011 7:13 pm
10259 Views
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Intimidation. I’ve been accused by my friends of being a very intimidating person. People for one reason or another have a certain fear of me. I would have to agree with them, I am a very intimidating person. In some ways it’s a wall I put up around myself as a defense. But most of the time I’m just intimidating because I enjoy it immensely.
Once I was asked if I would rather be feared or respected. I chose feared as people automatically respect what they fear, whereas respect is something that has to be earned. Don’t get me wrong, I do like earning respect, but the fear part is just plain fun.
I’ve also discovered that I intimidate the hell out of too many men on this site. I have pondered the reason for this for a very long time and have my own thoughts about it. But it wasn’t until I was speaking to my very good friend Quin yesterday that I found someone who could put the random thoughts I was thinking about this issue into words that other people could understand…so to speak.
I have not only been accused of being intimidating I have also been accused of being stubborn, bitchy, too independent, strong willed, having emotional baggage, being a frigid bitch, ice queen, and I have even been labeled The Ayatollah. Most of these labels I take as compliments, but others I see as utter bullshit.
Personally I see nothing wrong with being a strong, independent women who knows what she wants, goes after it, and isn’t willing to settle for less. And she doesn’t take any shit off of anyone. But others see this very differently.
As my friend Quin said to me, “the kind of woman a man goes after is a clear reflection on his manhood. Men that go after cookie cutter Barbie doll type women who bow to a mans point-of-view and wishes yet really don’t have a mind and opinions of their own show that a man is very weak-willed indeed.” I’d like to interject here that obviously this type of man is going to take the path of least resistance and go after this kind of woman because that is what society says he should want. Also in general they are lazy.
Quin went on to say, “But when a man goes after a headstrong independent woman who knows what she wants and isn’t afraid to go after it and gives as good as she gets, to me that is a real man. He wants a woman that has a mind of her own and isn’t afraid to use it.”
Granted, most men say that’s what they want yet when they actually get it they can’t handle it. Then the woman gets accused of being a frigid bitch and all the lovely aforementioned names I’ve already mentioned men tend to call strong women. To me, a real man that is secure in his manhood chooses the strong woman because he cannot let himself settle for anything less than his match.
Now, back to my point about being intimidating: one thing to say about that. I have my reasons. Yeah I use it as a wall and to talk to me you have to speak through it. But the way I figure it is if you were a real man you’d grab you some C4 and blow that fucking wall to bits and go after what’s inside. A man that is willing and able to do that is the only kind of man I want in my life. He can blow down that wall and can not only handle, but enjoy the fact that he has a strong woman by his side. That’s the only kind of man I want in my life. Every other man is just a sheep in the herd and they can keep on walking.
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To all those who frequent the Ohio chat room.....
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Posted:Jan 16, 2009 12:37 pm
Last Updated:Jan 18, 2009 6:07 am
9125 Views
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I appreciate your concern. However, there is absolutely nothing wrong with me. I am not pissed off or cranky or bitchy...well any more than usual. Since everyone feels the need to question everyone else but me about this I felt the need to say something.
For the record...THERE IS NOTHING WRONG OR AMATTER WITH ME. IF YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW GROW SOME FRIGGIN BALLS AND ASK ME INSTEAD OF EVERYONE ELSE!!!!
Thanks and see everyone in chat.
Bye, Fuck you and Love ya bunches!!!
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Horoscopes
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Posted:Jan 9, 2009 1:00 pm
Last Updated:Mar 2, 2009 10:43 am
9672 Views
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Talking to a friend earlier he directed me to a blog post of his that talked about his horoscope, science and Monty Python. For some reason it got me thinking about this juicy little morsel I found on the net ages ago so I figured I'd share it. Enjoy!
Aquarius (Jan 23 - Feb 22)You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal. You make the same mistakes repeatedly because you are stupid. Everyone thinks you are a fucking jerk.
Pisces (Feb 23 - Mar 22)You are a pioneer type and think most people are dickheads. You are quick to reprimand, impatient and full of advice. You do nothing but piss-off everyone you come in contact with. You are a prick.
Aries (Mar 23 - April 22) You have a wild imagination and often think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA. You have minor influence on your friends and people resent you for flaunting your power. You lack confidence and are a general dipshit.
Taurus (April 23 - May 22)You are practical and persistent. You have a dogged determination and work like hell. Most people think you are stubborn and bullheaded. You are nothing but a goddamned communist.
Gemini (May 23 - June 22)You are a quick and intelligent thinker. People like you because you are bisexual. You are inclined to expect too much for too little. This means you are a cheap bastard. Geminis are notorious for thriving on .
Cancer (June 23 - July 22)You are sympathetic and
understanding to other people's problems, which makes you a sucker. You are always putting things off. That is why you will always be on welfare and won't be worth a shit. Everyone in prison is a Cancer.
Leo (July 23 - Aug 22)You consider yourself a born leader. Others think you are an idiot. Most Leos are bullies. You are vain and cannot tolerate criticism. Your arrogance is disgusting. Leo people are thieving motherfuckers and enjoy masturbation more than sex.
Virgo (Aug 23 - Sept 22)You are a logical type and hate disorder. Your shit-picking attitude is sickening to your friends and co-workers. You are cold and unemotional and often fall asleep while fucking. Virgos make good bus drivers and pimps.
Libra (Sept 23 - Oct 22)You are the artistic type and have a difficult time dealing with reality. If you are a male you are probably queer. Chances for employment and monetary gain are nil. Most Libra women are whores. All Libras die of venereal disease.
Scorpio (Oct 23 - Nov 22)You are the worst of the lot. You are shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You shall achieve the pinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics. You are the perfect -of-a-bitch. Most Scorpios are murdered.
Sagittarius (Nov 23 - Dec 22)You are optimistic and enthusiastic. You have a reckless tendency to rely on your luck since you have no talent. The majority of Sagittarians are drunks. You are a worthless piece of shit.
Capricorn (Dec 23 - Jan 22)You are conservative and afraid of taking risks. You are basically chickenshit. There has never been a Capricorn of any importance. You should kill yourself.
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Alms for the poor....
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Posted:Jan 7, 2009 1:20 pm
Last Updated:May 21, 2012 11:06 pm
9370 Views
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Everyone knows in this day and age that the American economy is pretty much in the toilet. People are loosing their jobs left and right. The unemployment system is having issues because it can't handle the amount of people going online to apply for benefits. The Big Three auto companies have asked for and gotten a government bailout due to business sucking balls. Even the porn industry is having issues. You know shit is bad when the porn industry lays people off.
I can understand The Big Three automakers asking for a bailout from the government. After all it is a huge industry that employs a lot of people, and lets face it, this country couldn't handle the unemployment rate if those companies started having massive layoffs.
But after reading this little interesting tidbit on the news today, I couldn't help but laugh my ass off. This is taken from a celebrity website. It's a pretty popular site and it has it's own television show. Anywho here's what they said on their site....
Porn Kings to D.C. - Help Us Through Hard Times
Joe Francis and Larry Flynt claim the economy has made America's sexual appetite go limp, so they're going to the one place where sex is always rampant -- Congress.
Flynt (the "Hustler" guy) and Francis (the "Girls Gone Wild" dude) are asking the government for a $5 billion bailout, claiming the adult entertainment industry has taken a huge shot to the face because of the downturn -- citing the fact that XXX DVD sales are down 22% from a year ago.
"With all this economic misery and people losing all that money, sex is the farthest thing from their mind," Flynt says. "It's time for Congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America."
Francis sees his industry like the big three automakers, only BIGGER: "Congress seems willing to help shore up our nation's most important businesses; we feel we deserve the same consideration."
Francis says he's going to D.C. to personally make the pitch. Sounds like someone has a bone to pick.
Even though this borders on the absurd I'd be all for some kind of bailout for one reason only. HotMatch.com is owned by Penthouse and maybe if they got some of this money they could fix their damn server issues they constantly seem to have lately.
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Top 20 Gifts for Christ
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Posted:Dec 24, 2008 4:25 pm
Last Updated:Dec 28, 2008 4:20 pm
8885 Views
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Since we figured we were already going to hell, it just made sense that we would go for the VIP package.
So here are Thique's and my ideas on what to get Christ for his Birthday. Write these down kiddies, there will be a quiz later.
20.IPod Touch
19.Deluxe edition of The Last Temptation of Christ on Blu-Ray
18.Elvis to be my opening act in Vegas
17.Lifetime supply of Snapple
16.Never before opened copy of the White Album
15.Bark-o-lounger
14.Gold Membership to A F F(Thique and I could use one of those too)
13.Chia Pet
12.Autographed copy of the Bible
11.Jesus Bobble-head
10.A New Pair Of Sandals
9.Robes baby
8.A showgirl outfit for Mary
7.Tickets the the Inaugural Ball
6.Two round trip tickets on Noah's arc
5.A nice headband for the thorn scars
4.A puppy
3.The Idiots Guide to Magic
2.Putty
1.The Clapper
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If Christ was a swinger...
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Posted:Dec 20, 2008 4:45 am
Last Updated:Jan 8, 2009 3:42 pm
10811 Views
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Sitting up in the wee hours of the morning I got into a religious discussion with my very dear friend ThiqueMadamme and I, being the sick smart ass, said Christ should come to an HotMatch.com party. Which got us swatting back and forth what would Christ put on his profile. Here's our idea right here...
Profile of JD33AD
Headline..THIS...Is the last temptation of Christ!
Looking for that special someone who enjoys moonlight walks on water, drinking wine, smiting the evildoer. Must love long flowing robes and appreciates my sandal fetish. Oh and they must bow down and worship me.
My Ideal Person: Someone that doesn't mind I hang around with twelve dudes, well ten close friends and one I'm not sure about,and another who constantly denies we're friends. Girls that have the first name of Mary are a big plus. Have a good sense of humor. Must like magic tricks..first it's water,then it's wine,now it's water,now it's wine....One fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish.Hey it's Christ meets Seuss.
What are your favorite musicians or bands?: The Rolling Stones, Kris Kristopherson, Jesus was a Capricorn, and that's true.Jimi Hendrix, The Doors, Peter, Paul, and Mary...two were my best friend and you know how I feel about the name Mary.
Tell one of your favorite sexual fantasies. Don't hold back!:I can't reveal that, I'm Christ after all. I mean, I could tell you but I'd have to smite you.
What location do you fantasize about for a sexual encounter?:In my Fathers house...there are many mansions.
What types of sexual activities turn you on?:Missionary
Ever fantasized about having sex with a celebrity? Who? What turns you on about them?:You just can't beat Mary man. She's the slut of my life, the of my heart. She makes good communion wafers and all I have to do is bring the wine.
Have you ever had cybersex?: No but my Mom has.
What kind of night life do you enjoy?: Hanging with the boys. Sitting around a table, we talk, we eat, I tell them it's my blood and they drink it.
How big of a role does sex play in your life?: Sure I can use my infinite powers to give myself never ending orgasms, but there is nothing like the flesh of a woman.
What are your thoughts on anal sex?: My Father doesn't like that.
What's the largest number of people you've shared a sexual encounter with in one session?: Remember that wedding? That's all I'm sayin'.Why do you think we needed all that wine.
Have you ever had erotic pictures or video taken of you?: I don't show up on film.
Does size really matter to you?: Dude, Seriously?
Where would you like to live?: Seattle...I can see the space needle from my house!
What would be your dream house?: One without my Father.
What's your dream job?: Hello? Christ...King of Kings,Lord of Lords...Or a magician, I already know a few tricks.
What's your dream vacation/getaway?: Curing Lepers in India.
If you could do anything what would it be?: I've always wanted to be able to play peek-a-boo.
How do you handle set backs to your dreams?: I am the mighty smiter and I will smite you. Don't stand in the way of Christ's dreams or I'm coming back again.
How important is it to share the same dreams as your partners?: I am the dream of my partners...I make dreams come true.
Tell us about some dreams & goals you recently realized?: There was that pesky angel rebellion I had to put down...and I won the bet. Bite me Beelzebub.
What is your ideal fantasy "date"?: I meet a woman. She gets down on her knees and she cleans my feet with her hair.
What kind of relationship(s) do you want?: Ones where I'm not betrayed by my friends.
Where do you see yourself in a few years?: Taking back the Holy Land while vacationing from my gig in Vegas.
What is your favorite clothing style(s) during the day?: Robes and sandals all the way.
What is your favorite clothing style(s) during the night?: See above though I do add sparkly panties.
How would you describe your body, style, and appearance?: Other than those holes in my hands and feet, the indention's from those nasty thorns and that damn spear in my side I look pretty damn good.
Describe your most attractive feature.: My pancreas. It's what's inside that counts.
What body part do you first notice when you meet a person?: Lack of uniforms. I steer clear of Roman soldiers and their look a likes.
What do you consider the most attractive feature when looking for a sexual partner?: That they aren't into pain or bondage.
How much does physical appearance matter to you in a partner?: I'm Christ. I can fix any imperfection.
What do you think about piercings?: Dude, have you read my book?
I'll pass thanks.
What is your sexual health status?:
STD free (tested regularly)
What STDs are you comfortable with your partner having?:
STD free (tested regularly)
What types of activities interest you?: Moonlight walks on water, wine making, fishing, raising the dead, story telling, golf...Tiger Woods got his skills from me and I like watching my handy work, curling, you know, typical guy stuff.
What do you like to do in your free time?: Talk to my Father, read, play skeeball.
What are your favorite sports/teams?: New Orleans Saints, Anaheim Angels
What best describes the pace of your life?: I make my own hours.
How much time does your job take up in your life? See above.
Describe what you do for a living.: Savior. Motivational speak. King of Kings. Lord of Lords. of God. A little carpentry on the side.
How often are you online?: In my line of work constant access is mandatory.
What kind of place do you live in?: Duh, house of many mansions...Hello!
What do you like about where you live?: I don't. That's why I'm looking for prime real estate in Seattle. The whole seeing the space needle from my house thing is appealing.
What is your current dating situation?: You know seventy-two virgins kind of looses it's appeal after awhile. I want an experienced woman.
What is your family life like?: Overbearing Father. Absent Mother. And a world full of bastard .
How can HotMatch.com help you change your life?: I need to get my freak on B.C. style.
JC33AD's Information::
Gender:I have a penis and I know how to use it.
Birthdate:Dec. 25, 00
Sexual Orientation:Bicurious
Lives in:My Father's house
Relocate?:Yes please
Marital Status:Single
Height:Ten feet tall and bulletproof
Body Type:I'm Christ,I can have any body I want
Smoking:No
Drinking:More Wine
Drugs:I don't use Drugs
Education:Self taught, apprentice
Occupation:King of Kings/Carpenter
Race:Mixed breed
Religion:I'm Christ,worship me
Have :World full of bastards
Want :Not sure
Penis size:I have a magic penis so it varies
Speaks:Any damn language I want
Hair Color:Brown
Hair Length :Medium though I'm thinking about getting a fade
Eye Color :Brown
Glasses or Contacts :Both
My Trophy Case :Crown of thorns, cross, and a spear
Yeah, Thique and I know we have more than cemented our places in hell for this, but you got to admit it's funny as hell.
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Save the drama for yo Mama!
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Posted:Dec 13, 2008 3:40 pm
Last Updated:Dec 17, 2008 10:40 am
9164 Views
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I frequent the Ohio chat room on here a lot and the one thing I have noticed of late is the increasing amount of drama being brought to that room. It's enough to make my ass twitch!
I'm know we are all human and it is a chat room after all with humans communicating so personal things can and will be brought in there all the time. And usually that makes for a very interesting chat experience as it gives us loads of things to talk about. But what really pisses me off is all the bitches that insist on bringing their constant drama and bullshit in the room for all to see....and get sick of.
If you are having a dispute, break-up, what have you, with someone else from the same chat room it should be rule of thumb to keep that shit out of the chat room as everyone else neither wants to know nor do they care to hear about the constant crap.
The snide comments made back and forth between the disputing parties, the cut and paste committee that constantly feels the need to share what is being said in the room with the wronged parties, and the snide comments to friends of each wronged party in the room who have absolutely nothing to do with the problems at hand has gotten very old very quickly. And everyone is pretty much sick of it.
I know this may be news to the drama llama bitches of the room but the world doesn't revolve around you and your problems. The world isn't out to get you and you aren't nearly as important as you think you are. If you didn't bring your shit in the room people wouldn't be talking about it. You say you hate the drama and avoid it at all costs yet you constantly bring the shit up. You thrive on the drama you create whether or not you realize it.
The statement I made ages ago still stands...If you choose to talk about your problems and drama in an open chat room you loose the right to bitch about it when people decide to talk about it.
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Presumed dead, but they're only MIA.
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Posted:Nov 25, 2008 5:43 pm
Last Updated:Jan 7, 2009 3:57 pm
8850 Views
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It was years ago that I met these three individuals but it has been years since I have seen them. What are their names you wonder? They are none other than Wooing, Courting and Romance. They are three of the most delightful things in the world.
I know being on a site like HotMatch.com you would think people wouldn’t be looking for these three things as this is a sex site after all. Most people seem to think this site if actually called Slut/Stud Friend Finder, and maybe that works for them.
But for a lot of us this site represents a place you can find someone you can totally click with both inside and outside of the bedroom and we’re wanting more than just a one night stand.
But the thing that really gets to me is this…in this modern day world of instant gratification why have we lost the pure enchantment that arises from wooing, courting and romance?
Surely I can’t be the only one who enjoys romantic gestures such as the gift of flowers, a candlelit dinner, a drive in the country, relaxing at home and just talking to someone to gain a deeper knowledge of them or just simply holding hands.
Romantic little notes, emails, text messages or phone calls to let someone know you are thinking of them or sending bits of poetry or humor to brighten the day, make the heart beat faster and bring a smile to a face or laughter from the soul.
What about the small little gestures of a gentle touch to the face, a warm smile, a special look, running your fingers through a persons hair or just holding them close to feel their body against yours and just breathing them in.
After all, such things can only enhance the sex that will eventually come later. And what can be better than adding some wooing, romance and courting to heighten the anticipation and sexual energy that occurs when two people become one for that ever so brief amount of time.
It is such a shame these three things have been missing in action for an achingly long amount of time. I’d really like to see them again and keep them around.
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An open letter to Home Depot.
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Posted:Nov 25, 2008 4:03 pm
Last Updated:Jan 7, 2009 4:26 pm
8883 Views
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Dear Home Depot Store Manager,
I would like to inquire on the possibility of your store carrying and or stocking clueX4’s as I seem to keep encountering men in desperate need of being smacked in the head with them.
These are men that seem to be hopelessly clueless when it comes to pretty much everything, especially when it comes to woman, romance, relationships and the like.
On one hand, you have men that have the uncanny knack of choosing the exact kind of woman they are trying to avoid. They choose the women that constantly drive them absolutely insane because of the way they act or the things they do, which in turn makes the man want to crawl in a hole and hide like a hermit because he keeps meeting the wrong kind of woman. Then they wonder why it is they are alone and can’t find that special someone to share their time with. They know exactly what it is they seek in a woman yet they are too afraid of going after what they really desire. Because, well, if they actually did go after the kind of woman they truly want a commitment of some sort might come of finding and being able to hold on to the type of woman they seek. This for some unknown reason that scares the hell out of them. Kind of makes you wonder if they enjoy the constant misery they inflict on themselves. This is when the misery of getting beaten half to death with a clueX4 might actually be helpful.
On the other hand, you have the clueless men who have a woman staring them in the face yet they don’t see she is there. Granted some men can be shy and they hope a woman will make the first move to show that they are interested in them. They want to make sure the woman doesn’t think he is putting the moves on her just to get in her pants. I can understand that logic. But when you have a woman that has made so many first moves to let you know she is interested in you and knows you aren’t after a quick booty call yet you still can’t see that she wants you, you clearly need beaten senseless with multiple clueX4’s as you obviously aren’t seeing what is right in front of you.
Then you have the type of men that seem to have a fixation on one part of a woman. If other women that are interested in them do not have the exact feature they are looking for they are automatically excluded even if they like everything else about said woman. These men need a truckload of clueX4’s dropped on them though a crushing blow like that isn’t likely to help them.
And don’t even get me started on the men who are just after a booty call and wonder why most women with any self respect won’t give them the time of day. And let’s not forget the men who are hours/miles/states away from women they try to chat up or the desperate, lonely, whiny men looking for the sympathy fuck. Lastly, there are the men who chat up women yet when they get rejected said woman suddenly goes from hot prospect to fat, nasty, skanky bitch all in the blink of an eye. Being clueX4d to death is the only option for these fellows as they are never going to get it and never will as their brains can’t seem to process how to actually catch and keep a woman’s attention and interest.
Please, by all means do let me know how soon you will be getting and keeping clueX4’s in your stores. I can almost guarantee that your female store patronage would increase exponentially.
Sincerely,
A woman whose head is sore from banging it against the wall due to stupid men.
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A Quiz Borrowed...
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Posted:Sep 27, 2008 3:10 pm
Last Updated:Jan 21, 2009 12:08 pm
9140 Views
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Since I am being promised a can of silly string for posting this, here is a fun little quiz. I'll be nice and moderate the answers so no one has to see them but me. Game on!
1) Do I look like a good kisser to you?
[ ] yes
[ ] no
2) Would you kiss me if given the chance?
[ ]yes
[ ]no
3) Am I ...
[ ]sexy as hell
[ ]fine
[ ]nice looking
[ ]cute
[ ]stunning
[ ]ugly!
4) Do you like oral sex?
[ ] yes
[ ] no
[ ] don't know
5) I look like. . .
[ ] a player
[ ] sweetheart
[ ] one time thing
[ ] your sister
6) If you saw me for the first time would you talk to me?
[ ] yes
[ ] no
7) Would you rather. . .
[ ] talk with me
[ ] kiss me
[ ] have sex with me
[ ] tie me up
[ ] spank me
[ ] all of the above
On a scale from 1 - 10 (10 being the highest) , rate me...
[ ] 1
[ ] 2
[ ] 3
[ ] 4
[ ] 5
[ ] 6
[ ] 7
[ ] 8
[ ] 9
[ ]10
9) What would you want me to be to you?
[ ] friend
[ ] fuck buddy
[ ] friend w/benefits
10) Will you post this on your site so I can answer your questions?
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
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, 4 Pending
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They say people are dying to get in...I was dying to get out!
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Posted:Sep 9, 2008 5:03 pm
Last Updated:Dec 6, 2008 8:26 pm
9062 Views
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I'm one of those types of people that seems to have a knack for getting themselves into interesting situations in life. I seem to do it all the time and it makes for great laughs for my friends. Case in point....
One friday I had gotten off of work and was feeling a little down. So driving around after work I was going down down a street that intersects with the road that is the entrance of Greenlawn Cemetery in Columbus, Ohio. So I had a thought in my head that I haven't driven through there in awhile, and it was such a nice day I figured why not.
Yeah I'm a little weird. I like driving through cemeteries and looking at the tombstones and plants and trees and shit because it's soothing and calming to me, and it gives me time to think. Plus tombstones are works of art in and of themselves if you think about it and here I am rambling.
Anywho it was about 6pm on a friday afternoon and I'm driving around the cemetery just looking around and feeling the gentle breeze blowing through the car windows. I feel an incredible sense of calm and I like that very much. I had driven past a man in a pickup truck who stopped me and reminded me I couldn't exit through the back gate as they always keep that locked. I said I knew that, I was just driving around. He said ok and drove off so I continued my meandering through the cemetery. The next time I checked the time it was 7:25pm and I figured I had driven around enough and it was time to head home. Here is where the fun begins....
I drive back to the main entrance to leave and I discover that the gate is locked. I didn't realize the cemetery closed at 7pm during the summer. I'm thinking shit, lets go check the back gate. So I drive all the way through the cemetery to the back gate to check and yep, it's locked too. So now I'm thinking I'm going to be locked in a cemetery all damn night and the cops will show up and take my dumb ass to jail.
I head back to the front gate hoping it's somehow unlocked, which of course, it isn't.
I decided I need a little help here so I pick up my cellphone and call my friend Kim. When she answers the phone the first thing I said to her is...You're not going to believe what just happened to me. I do give her credit, she was able to hold back her laughter for a little bit. I ask her to find me the number to the cemetery office and for the non-emergency number for the police. She gives me both numbers and tells me to call her back and let her know how things turn out.
I call the cemetery office which was closed of course, but I leave a message anyway in the hopes someone will get it soon and unlock the gate. I then call the police. That call would have went right through with no problem if it wasn't the business office number and their office was closed as well. I call Kim back and say to her "you want to give me the right number to the police now cause the was the business office". She's cracking up laughing the whole time but manages to get me the correct number and tells me again to call her and let her know how things turn out.
Dialing the police I proceed to tell the woman who answered my name and the problem I am having. It really doesn't help matters when you are explaining your problem to the police and they are laughing hysterically at you. But luck was on my side. As I was on the phone getting laughed at a pickup truck pulls up behind me...it's the same man I had spoken to earlier.
I ask him..."please tell me you have a key to this gate so I can get out"...he says "sure honey I can let you out.I was wondering where you had gotten off to because I hadn't seen you leave". I tell the policewoman that a grounds keeper is here so I'm taken care of now. She continues laughing and says if I have anymore problems feel free to call.
Long story short, I got out of the cemetery, didn't get hauled off to jail and all my friends got a good laugh. I swear I have one of those lives.
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I think it's time for an upgrade.
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Posted:Aug 28, 2008 4:43 pm
Last Updated:Jan 7, 2009 4:34 pm
9201 Views
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I have the luck of working in a place where I can listen to my own music player all day. I've seen other people in the building walking around doing their work while listening to music so today I figured I'd do the same thing. Music is a nice distraction and it can make the time go faster.
Every other person in the building listening to their music does so on an ipod or some other kind of mp3 player.Me, I'm still old school and had the idea of bringing my cd player in to work today.It seemed like a bright idea at the time.Then I realized I had no way to carry it around with me while I'm working.
So me being the wacky inventive sort that I am decided to stuff said cd player down my pants and walk around with it that way.It wasn't a very comfortable way to work all day but at least I didn't drop the damn thing on the floor.I got some interesting looks and smart ass remarks from my coworkers when I kept reaching down my pants to adjust the thing.
I guess I need to face the facts and realize cd players are quickly becoming a thing of the past.Hell Target doesn't even sell cd players anymore.I'm going to cave and buy myself an mp3 player this weekend.An mp3 player will be much smaller and easier to carry around,and I won't have to stuff the thing down my pants to carry it.
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