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CITRATE MAGNESIUM OH MY LOLOL OWW
Posted:Feb 9, 2020 4:54 am
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2024 2:45 pm
4056 Views

For anyone that ever had Height and Weight and needed them extra 3 lbs swear I can't stop laughing at this post🤣🤣🤣

What happens when you drink 10 oz of Magnesium Citrate?
I'm glad you asked...

12:05 pm: It's time. You shotgun a 10 oz bottle like it's a lukewarm PBR and you don't want to be a pussy in front of your older brother's friends.

It's suppose to be grape flavored but it's becoming quite clear that whoever led the R&D team that day has never actually tasted anything grape in their life. You are already regretting this decision.

12:06 pm: You deep throat a cupcake like you've been saving it for the apocalypse because let's face it...that time is here. It's going to turn to liquid form before it even clears your throat but you don't care. All is right in the world at this moment. Hold on to that. You're about to enter a very dark period in your life.

12:37 pm: First sign of life. The pressure is growing. You already have 5 lbs of impacted shit in your colon and you basically just drank the "safe for humans" version of Drano. You feel a poop coming on finally. You think it's time. You're wrong. You get a little snake turd as a teaser.

Take note...this is the last semi-solid thing you will see leaving your body for the next 24 hours.

12:57 pm: That little science experiment you got cooking is about to reach it's boiling point. Your stomach is angry now. It hates you...you can feel it. You have exactly .3 seconds to make it to the nearest toilet but you can't run... NEVER run! You pray to god there is enough elasticity in your butthole to keep the gates closed 5 more steps as you start to preemptively undo your pants to save valuable time. Almost there. 3...2...1...

12:58 pm: Sweet Mary, mother of God...is this real life? Your cheeks barely hit the seat and all hell breaks loose. The shit/ water mixture you've just created comes out with such force that it actually sprays the back of the toilet bowl at a 45 degree angle thus deflecting it in every direction but down.

Is that blood?

False alarm.

That's just the remnants of a cherry pie you ate at Thanksgiving...when you were 5. The smell is horrid...the sound is frightening. You try to clench whats left of your asshole to soften the blow but it's not working. The whole house just heard your liquid shit fart as it gurgled out of your ass.

1:06 pm- 8:30 pm: Everything's a blur. You have shit out everything you have ever eaten since the day you were born, everything your ancestors have ever eaten since the early 1800's, and your asshole now feels like you have a flaming hot Cheeto and the tears of a thousand Jalapeno seeds stuck in it.

You're now curled up in the bathtub ugly crying because you have to remain within arm's reach of the toilet at all times. You have the poop sweats.

You meet Jesus.

8:37 pm: Your family will never be able to unsee the things they've seen in the last 8 hours.

You're broken.

Your asshole's broken.

Your spirit's broken.

Life as you know it will never be the same. But...tomorrow's a new day. You're going to wake up, throw on the only remaining pair of underwear you have that doesn't have a shit stain on it, and you're going to run up to Target with the last shred of dignity you have left...and buy yourself a new toilet brush. You've earned it.
0 Comments
ORGASMS YOWZER
Posted:Feb 9, 2020 4:50 am
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2024 2:45 pm
6301 Views

Everything in This Slideshow
The more Os, the merrier
The more Os, the merrier

Any type of orgasm feels incredible, and there’s nothing wrong with sticking to the strokes and touches that you know bring you to the brink every time. But variety really is the spice of life. You wouldn't eat the same three meals every day, nor would you wear the same outfit over and over. So why not expand your sexual horizons and explore the 11 different types of orgasms the female body is capable of?

RELATED: 10 Eye-Opening Facts You Actually Didn’t Know About Vaginas, Sex, Orgasms, and More

Before getting started, it helps to understand what an orgasm actually is. “An orgasm is a physical reflex that occurs when muscles tighten during sexual arousal and then relax through a series of rhythmic contractions,” says gynecologist Dr. Sherry Ross, MD. Each climax can feel different in terms of intensity and duration, depending on how and what part of your body is being aroused, she adds. Besides providing a physical release, it's also an emotional one—allowing you to feel closer to your partner or simply de-stress after a tough day.

Some kinds of orgasm focus on the vagina only; others allow you to feel earth-quaking intensity in places you never thought of as erogenous zones. You owe it to yourself to find out the pleasure your body can experience—allow us to get you up to speed with all the different Os out there.

RELATED: We Asked 8 Women What an Orgasm Feels Like to Them—Here's What They Told Us
Clitoral orgasm
Clitoral orgasm

The clitoris is the go-to sweet spot for most women when they want to experience the pleasure and release of an orgasm. But while clitoral orgasms may be the most accessible kind, this tiny, mostly hidden bliss button is highly individualistic. Every woman prefers a different types of touch here to reach climax.

“The clitoris is a very sensitive part of a woman’s anatomy, composed of millions of nerve endings similar to that of the penis,” says Dr. Ross. Having it touched, caressed, or stroked via direct or indirect stimulation (in other words, through fabric, or by touching the labia surrounding the clitoris) prompts an increase in blood flow to the area, making the clitoris engorged and in need of release.

RELATED: This Is How People Orgasm Around the World

A study from the Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy found that several types of clitoral strokes (think up-and-down, back-and-forth, and both wide and small circles) can lead to orgasm. Experiment on your own and show your partner what you like. If clitoral orgasms don't come easy for you or you're having trouble reaching climax, consider looking into sex toys designed with clitoral orgasm in mind, such as a mini vibrator you or your partner can wear on your fingertips.

RELATED: 5 Oral Sex Positions That Make It Easy for You to Have an Orgasm
G-spot orgasm
G-spot orgasm

Your G-spot is on the front wall of your vagina, about halfway between your vaginal opening and cervix. It's not something you can see but you can usually feel it; insert a finger into your vagina and press forward (making a come-hither motion). You should detect a slightly bumpy or ridged area, says Dr. Ross. For some women, it feels spongy.

Pressing this spot gently and stroking it lightly is what many women do to prime themselves for a G-spot orgasm, also known as a vaginal orgasm. “When you’re sexually aroused, the G-spot will fill with blood and swell up," says Dr. Ross. Touching it in a way that feels good to you with fingers, your partner's penis, or a vibrator can trigger what many women describe as a deeply intense, shaken-to-the-core kind of climax.

RELATED: Your G-Spot: What It Is, How to Find It, and All the Things It Can Do for Your Sex Life
Blended orgasm
Blended orgasm

If you can handle two, three, or even four times the intensity and pleasure of a regular O, this kind of orgasm is for you. A blended orgasm is a climax that happens when more than one erogenous zone is being stimulated at the same time. G-spot penetration along with clitoral touching is one way to experience the explosive orgasm that typically results. But it could also come from vaginal penetration along with clitoral, nipple, or anal stimulation—or all of these simultaneously.

RELATED: The Blended Orgasm Can Make Sex Even More Intense—Here's How to Have One

“The more stimulation there is, the more blood flow will result, and the bigger the orgasm will be,” says Prudence Hall, MD, gynecologist and medical director of the Hall Center in Southern California. Many combinations of touching and teasing can trigger a blended orgasm, but if you're looking to have one with a partner, consider the woman on top position (your hands, and your partner's, are free to touch your clitoris, breasts, or butt) or bringing a vibrator into the bedroom.
Anal orgasm
Anal orgasm

Anal sex or anal play isn't every woman's cup of tea. Some love it and others don't care for it at all. But if you're in the former category (or you've never tried it before and think you might be), an anal orgasm is one you should know about.

RELATED: How Risky Is Anal Sex? A Gynecologist Explains

Because the anus and rectum are so close to the vagina and clitoris—and are connected by a thin stretch of tissue called the perineum—they share many of the same nerves and muscles, including the PC (or pelvic floor) muscle, says Dr. Hall. The PC muscle is highly sensitive for many women, and stimulating it can trigger a vaginal orgasm—and an anal one as well, she says.

Still not sure about this one? Take it from the many women who do report having orgasms from anal sex. But this type of sex does come with risks that are important to consider before you try it. Safe sex is a must for you and your partner.

RELATED: 6 Things Every Woman Needs to Know About Butt Plugs
Deep vaginal erogenous zone orgasm
Deep vaginal erogenous zone orgasm

The clitoris and G-spot aren't the only pleasure buttons below the belt. Real women as well as sex researchers say that there are additional erogenous zones inside the vagina that when touched the right way can lead to what's collectively known as a deep vaginal orgasm.

RELATED: 4 Ways to Overcome Orgasm Roadblocks

First comes the A-spot, located on the high front (or anterior) wall of the vagina just beneath the cervix. Next is the O-spot (for orgasm), which can be found on the back wall of the vagina, almost behind the cervix. “I can’t see these when I look at a vagina," Dr. Hall says. But the ligaments here contain nerves that appear to be highly sensitive for many women. If fingers, a toy, or a penis fills the vagina enough at the high end of it and those nerves are really stimulated, it can be very, very pleasurable, she believes. "It could cause the whole uterus to contract during an orgasm—there can be massive contractions in the whole area," she adds.

RELATED: The 5 Best Sex Positions for Deep Penetration
Squirting orgasm
Squirting orgasm

Yes, female ejaculation really exists; it's the hallmark of this type of orgasm. “Sometimes when women are sexually aroused or stimulated there is an expulsion of fluid from the glands around the urethra or anterior surface of the vagina during or before orgasm, though it’s still hotly contested where the fluid actually comes from,” says Dr. Ross. The fluid is typically clear and doesn't resemble urine, and there can be a moderate amount released or a full-on gush.

RELATED: What Exactly Is Female Ejaculation—and Can Every Woman Do It?

G-spot stimulation is the type of touching that typically leads to squirting. But caressing and teasing the area surrounding the urethra has also been known to result in a soak-the-sheets climax. “No one really knows the exact number of women who experience a squirting orgasm, so with that uncertainty in mind, it was found that 10-50% of women have, at one time or another, had a 'gushing' moment during orgasm,” says Dr. Ross.

RELATED: 3 Things We Can Learn From Women Who Orgasm Every Time
Cervical orgasm
Cervical orgasm

this video, sex therapist and Health contributing editor Gail Saltz shares the top reasons that sex, either on one’s own or with a supportive partner, can help improve your physical and mental wellbeing. From burning calories and strengthening your vaginal walls, to reducing stress and helping you sleep, sex offers a range of health benefits. Watch the video to learn all about it.
Nipple orgasm
Nipple orgasm

You know your breasts and nipples are major erogenous zones; your nipples especially react to being touched and stroked, since they're loaded with nerve endings and super sensitive skin. But some women really can experience a big O just by having their nipples caressed and kissed. There's no clear consensus on how many women are able to orgasm without any below the belt contact, and researchers aren't sure why nipple orgasms happen.

But hey, if the idea appeals to you, you could have a lot of fun trying to figure it out. With enough kissing, sucking, and caressing, “these are zones that can bring some woman to orgasm,” confirms Dr. Ross.

RELATED: 11 Celebrities on What They Think About Their Breasts
Exercise orgasm/coregasm
Exercise orgasm/coregasm

Reaching climax while engaged in a tough workout may sound a little strange. But workout-induced orgasms, or coregasms, are real. A study from Indiana University found that 370 of 530 women surveyed had experienced orgasm or sexual pleasure while working out, usually from core-based exercises.

RELATED: This Woman Says She Had an Exercise-Induced Orgasm at the Gym—Here’s How That’s Possible

“One of the ways to induce an orgasm is to super-squeeze your PC muscles and you can develop them and make them stronger,” says Dr. Hall. “If someone has very well developed PC muscles and during exercises they really start to contract them, I think orgasms are absolutely possible during that.” But most women will need some type of clitoral and/or vaginal stimulation to go along with that if they want to see stars as well, she adds.
Sleep orgasm
Sleep orgasm

We've had sensual dreams before. But this is a whole other thing. “Some women can have an orgasm during an erotic dream while sleeping,” says Dr. Ross. One report indicates that 37% of women have had one of these sleep orgasms by the time they’re 45, but it’s difficult to know how common they really are.

RELATED: What to Know About Sexsomnia, a Rare Sleep Disorder Where You Have Sex in Your Sleep

Sleep orgasms usually start with a sexy dream, which causes increased blood flow to the genitals as well as major relaxation, which somehow allows the body to reach orgasm while a woman isn't even awake.

RELATED: What to Know About Sleep Orgasms, According to a Woman Who Experiences Them Twice a Month
Multiple orgasms
Multiple orgasms

You can't have too much of a good thing, right? That's the appeal of multiple orgasms, something women can indulge in because unlike men, females don't experience a refractory period after climaxing that requires some downtime before gearing up for round two.

“Women reach a certain heightened state of ecstasy with their first orgasm, and then can stay up there on this plateau,” says Dr. Hall. “With more and more simulation, they can have multiple orgasms.” Many women do experience this, she says, but not every woman will want to.

RELATED: 8 Weird Facts About Sex You’ll Wish You Knew Sooner

But if you do, here's a strategy: keep contracting your pelvic muscles on your own (by squeezing and releasing the way you would if you were holding in your urine stream), suggests Dr. Hall. This keeps blood flow high, which increases sensitivity and makes orgasm number 2 easier to reach. If you don’t go all the way back down to the pre-arousal state, you can work your way up to another orgasm more quickly.
0 Comments
IS LIFE AN ILLUSION?
Posted:Aug 6, 2019 1:08 am
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2024 2:45 pm
3975 Views

🧠 Our mind is dividing into the conscious mind and the subconscious mind.

🤔 We process all our information in the conscious mind. It’s where we think about things, analyse, criticise, make decisions and try to remember things. It’s constantly spinning around from thought to thought. Interestingly, it’s not fully developed until around puberty. Those of you with might relate to this.

🙌 The subconscious mind is the non-analytical part of our brain that is fully developed at birth. It’s there to help us survive by learning from & observing our parents, peers and environment while we’re growing up. It’s all about instincts, feelings and emotions, and it’s where all the early information we receive is stored. It believes everything because it doesn’t have a filter – so it doesn’t know what is true or not true.

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 So, when I was a and my parents told me ‘Jeni, you have to go to university to get a secure, well paid job’ I believed them and went to university. When my mum said ‘Money doesn’t make you happy’ I took that on board too & for most of my life I didn't respect $$.

💫 Here’s the big thing. Our subconscious mind RUNS OUR LIVES based on unfiltered, unanalyzed information it gathered when we were growing up – our beliefs and values.

💫 Our beliefs can be about people, work, society, fear, confidence, Money, our ability, our appearance, self-worth, health and fitness, relationships, our parenting, emotions… just about everything.

💫 Most of the time we are completely oblivious to these subconscious beliefs… but they are there, and they often govern our choices and actions.

💫 When our conscious mind finally shows up, it thinks it’s in control... but it isn’t.

🤔 That’s why so many of us travel through life doing everything we think is right and remain mystified as to why we’re not living the fantastic life we truly want.

💃 It’s not until we become aware of our beliefs and start to question them that life becomes really interesting. That’s when we start to WAKE UP… and we realise we can get rid of our limiting subconscious beliefs and replace them with empowering beliefs that will help us live extraordinary lives.

🙌 I didn’t become aware of many of my beliefs until about 4 years ago when I started doing some personal development. My dream was to stop working for someone else and to start my own business. My beliefs about myself and what was possible had to change because my employee mentality got in the way of my desire to become a business person.

🥰 It was very obvious to me many of my beliefs weren’t helping me improve my life. And I’ve had to look at my beliefs again now that I have started my own business, stepped into leadership & am earning a better income. So, out with any beliefs that don’t serve me and time to replace them with kickass beliefs and a mindset for success.

🙌 The first step in changing our beliefs is to start looking at them. To wake up and become aware.
1 comment

Posted:Jul 3, 2017 1:22 am
Last Updated:Aug 21, 2019 8:47 pm
5706 Views

A white mother visits her for dinner...
who just happens to live with a girl roommate.
During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how pretty his black roommate was.
She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two of them, and this encounter had only made her more curious.
Over the course of the evening....
while watching the two interact,
she started to wonder if there was a bit more between he and his roommate than met the eye.
Reading his mother's thoughts, her quickly volunteered a disclaimer,
“I know what you must be thinking Mom,
but I assure you, we are really just roommates."

About a week later, his roommate came to him saying,
“Ever since your mother came to dinner,
I've been unable to find the silver plate.
You don't suppose she took it, do you?"

He said,
"Well, I doubt it....
but I'll email her anyway,
just to be sure."

He sat down and wrote:
"Dear Mom,
I'm not saying that you "did" take the silver plate from my house,
but I'm not saying that you "did not" take the silver plate...
the fact remains that it has been missing...
ever since you were here for dinner.
Love,
Your ."

Several days later,
he received an email from his mother which read:
"Dear ,
I'm not saying that you "do" sleep with your gorgeous roommate,
and I'm not saying that you "do not" sleep with her.
But the fact remains that if she were sleeping in her OWN BED,
she would have found the silver plate by now,
under her pillow…
Love,
Your Mom."
2 Comments
HOME REMEDIES VERY GOOD
Posted:Jun 29, 2017 1:25 am
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2024 2:45 pm
6356 Views

1) Lemons. Healthy Holistic Living cannot emphasis enough what a superfood lemons are. They have antibacterial properties, the Vitamin C component boosts our immune systems, and the acetic acid is so powerful it can also be used as a great cleaning product around your home. The most pleasant way to get your lemon fix is to add two teaspoons of freshly squeezed juice to a cup of warm water, a sweeten it with some honey (which is also good for reducing phlegm - we'll get to that next).
2) Honey. This wonderful sweet treat is recognized as a demulcent, which soothes your throat. According to Healthy Holistic Living, honey also contains dextromethorphan which is commonly found in cough medicines. There are a number of ways you can take honey - try a tablespoon of it with a pinch of black pepper, which will aid in fighting the infection. You can add honey to warm water (with or without lemon), and you can have multiple cups a day. Watch your sugar intake with this one, but if you're not diabetic then a few spoons a day while you're unwell won't do you any harm.
3) Steam. This is one of the best ways to loosen up stubborn phlegm in your chest and throat. The hot steam liquefies the phlegm, allowing you to cough it up, according to Live strong. Try having a long, hot shower, keeping the fan off and the doors closed to seal in all the steam. Alternatively, you can fill a mixing bowl or a basin with boiling water. Lean over the bowl with your head covered by a towel and inhale the steam for as long as necessary to loosen up the phlegm. Be very careful with this method, as steam can cause serious burns. Approach it gently without putting your face too close to the water, and ensure there are no or pets around who might accidentally tip the water over.
4) Chest percussion. WebMD describes a technique whereby you create vibrations on the chest using a cupped hand. These vibrations help to move the phlegm into larger airways so that it can be coughed up. Chest percussion can be done at home by a partner, but it is important that you see your doctor first for proper instruction. You can see further explanation including diagrams here.
5) Salt Water. This is a fantastic remedy for three reasons, according to Top 10 Home Remedies. Salt water is a powerful antibacterial agent, it relaxes your throat, and it reduces inflammation. Dissolve a pinch of salt in a glass of warm water and gargle. Rinse and repeat several times a day.
6) Nasal Irrigation. We've talked about gargling salt water, but you can also try rinsing your nasal passages with it. Nasal irrigation is the method of pouring a saline solution into one nostril to loosen up the mucus that has collected there, and then draining it out of the other nostril. WebMD emphasizes the importance of using distilled or boiled water when making your own saline solution, and to rinse your irrigation device after each use.
7) Turmeric. Turmeric may be the latest super-spice, but people have been using it for thousands of years. According to Top 10 Home Remedies, turmeric's antiseptic properties kill the bacteria that cause excessive mucus, and turmeric naturally strengthens the immune system. Try simply adding a teaspoon of turmeric to a glass of hot water, and gargling. You can also add it to a glass of hot milk for a soothing and spicy drink, but take care with this one as many people find that milk encourages the production of phlegm.
Warm compress. Try soaking a washcloth in hot water and laying it over the affected areas of your body - the warmth will heat up and liquefy the mucus.
9) Essential Oils. Natural Living Ideas suggests making use of a diff-user to waft the aroma of essential oils throughout your room. Eucalyptus, peppermint and rosemary are all essential oils with decongestant properties that help to open the airways.
10) Hot drinks. You might have noticed a common thread throughout these remedies - many of them include a glass of warm water. Natural Living Ideas emphasizes the importance of drinking hot drinks while you're under the weather. They're comforting and keep you hydrated, but they're also effective in loosening mucus from your throat and chest. You can have warm water with lemon, herbal teas, or even a cup of chicken broth. This isn't an old wives tale - researchers have tested the effects of hot and cold drinks on people suffering from the flu, and found that those who were given a hot drink experienced instant and prolonged relief from their flu symptoms.
Advertisement
Stubborn phlegm in your chest and throat is frustrating, and prolonged coughing in an attempt to get it out can irritate the walls of your throat and hurt your chest and ribs. Try these natural home remedies instead to warm and soften the mucus, allowing it to travel more easily through your airways and out of your body.
1 comment
NOW THIS WOULD BE A BAD DAY LOLOLOL
Posted:Jun 29, 2017 1:21 am
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2024 2:45 pm
6389 Views

NOW THIS WOULD BE A BAD DAY LOLOLOL

My night began as any other normal weeknight.
Come home, fix dinner, play with the . I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my mind for the next few hours: 'Maybe I should pull the waxing kit out of the medicine cabinet. So I headed to the site of my demise: the bathroom. It was one of those 'cold wax' kits. No melting a clump of hot wax, you just rub the strips together in your hand, they get warm and you
peel them apart and press them to your leg (or wherever else) and you pull the hair right off.
No muss, no fuss. How hard can it be? I mean, I'm not a genius, but I am mechanically inclined enough to figure this out.
(YA THINK!?!)
So I pull one of the thin strips out. Its two strips facing each other stuck together. Instead of rubbing them together, my genius kicks in so I get out the hair dryer and heat it to 1000 degrees.
'Cold wax,' yeah...right!) I lay the strip across my20thigh. Hold the skin around it tight and pull. It works!
OK, so it wasn't the best feeling, but it wasn't too bad. I can do this! Hair removal no longer eludes me!
I am She-rah, fighter of all wayward body hair and maker of smooth skin extraordinaire.
With my next wax strip I move north. After checking on the ,
I sneak back into the bathroom, for the ultimate hair fighting
championship. I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet.
Using the same procedure, I apply the wax strip across the right side of my bikini line, covering the right half of my hoo-ha and stretching down to the inside of my butt cheek (it was a long
strip) I inhale deeply and brace myself....RRRRIIIPPP!!!!
I'm blind!!! Blinded from pain!!!!....OH MY GAWD!!!!!!!!!
Vision returning, I notice that I've only managed to pull off half the strip. CRAP! Another deep breath and RIPP! Everything is
spinning and spotted.
I think I may pass out.....must stay conscious...must stay conscious. Do I hear crashing drums??? Breathe,
breathe...OK, back to normal.
I want to see my trophy - a wax covered strip, the one that has caused me so much pain, with my hairy pelt sticking to it.
I want to revel in the glory that is my triumph over body hair.
I hold up the strip!
There's no hair on it.
Where is the hair??? WHERE IS THE WAX???
Slowly I ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet. I see the hair. The ha ir that should be on the strip...it's not! I touch. I am touching wax.
I run my fingers over the most sensitive part of my body, which is now covered in cold wax and matted hair. Then I make the next
BIG mistake... remember my foot is still propped upon the toilet? I know I need to do something. So I put my foot down.
Sealed shut! My butt is sealed shut. Sealed shut!
I penguin walk around the bathroom trying to figure out what to do and think to myself 'Please don't let me get the urge to
poop..
My head may pop off!' What can I do to melt the wax?
Hot water!! Hot water melts wax!! I'll run the hottest water I can stand, into the bathtub, get in, immerse the wax-covered
bits and the wax should melt and I can gently wipe it off, right???
*WRONG!!!!!!!*
I get in the tub - the water is slightly hotter than that used to torture prisoners of war or sterilize surgical equipment - I sit.
Now, the only thing worse than having your nether regions glued together, is having them glued together and then glued to the
bottom of the tub....in scalding hot water.
Which, by the way, doesn't melt cold wax.
So, now I'm stuck to the bottom of the tub as though I had cemented myself to the porcelain!! God bless the man who had convinced me a few months ago to have a phone put in the bathroom!!!!!
I call my friend, thinking surely she has waxed before and has some secret of how to get me u ndone. It's a very good
conversation starter. 'So, my butt and hoo-ha are glued together to the bottom of the tub!'
There is a slight pause. She doesn't know any secret tricks for removal but she does try to hide her laughter from me.
She wants to know exactly where the wax is located,
Are we talking cheeks or hoo-ha?'
She's laughing out loud by now . I can hear her. I give her the rundown and she suggests I call the number on the side of the
box. YEAH!!!!! Right!! I should be the joke of someone else's night.
While we go through various solutions. I resort to trying to scrape the wax off with a razor. Nothing feels better than to have
your girlie goodies covered in hot wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot water and then dry-shaving the sticky wax off!! By now the brain is not working, dignity has taken a major hike and I'm pretty sure I'm going to need Post-Traumatic Stress counseling for this event.
My friend is still talking with me when I finally see my saving grace....the lotion they give you to remove the excess wax.
What do I really have to lose at this point? I rub
some on and OH MY GOD!!!!!!! The scream probably woke the and scared the dickens out of my friend. It's sooo painful, but I really don't care.
IT WORKS!!
It works !!' I get a hearty congratulation from my friend and she hangs up. I successfully remove the remainder of the wax and
then notice to my grief and despair... THE HAIR IS STILL THERE.......ALL OF IT!
So I recklessly shave it off. Heck, I'm numb by now. Nothing hurts. I could have amputated my own leg at this point.
2 Comments
HINTS
Posted:Jun 5, 2016 2:01 am
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2024 2:45 pm
6122 Views

PEOPLE PEOPLE PEOPLE ..
WHEN U TAKE PICS LOOK AT THE BACK GROUND .. AND THE PICS OVER THE TOILET BOWL ARE RATHER HMMMMMMMM ..
LOOK STRAIGHT AHEAD ONCE U AIM ..
MORE CHEST LESS COCK PICS ,, YOU COCK DOES NOT CHANGE , FROM ONE PIC TO 20 PICS ON YA PROFILE .. I SWEAR ITS A FIXATION LOL ..
SMILE WHEN U CLICK ,, SOME PICS ARE PLAIN OLD SCARY .. HONEST ,
SEEN AXE MURDERS SMILE MORE AND LOOK LESS SINISTER,,
YES ITS A SEX SITE BUT DAUMMMMMM ...
LADIES , SOME OF YA JUST ABOUT INSERT A SPECULUM SO ALL CAN SEE YA CERVIX ,, UMM WHY ????
JUST THINGS TO PONDER ..
OH AND THE ONES THAT POST A PIC OF YOU AND YA ,, ARE U KIDDING ME ??? ON A ADULT SITE ???? WOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
ENIGMA
0 Comments , 1 Pending
NO BOTS
Posted:Sep 16, 2015 1:30 am
Last Updated:Sep 17, 2015 12:34 am
8771 Views

FriendFinder Networks Founder States: “Computer Generated Fembots Do Not Belong in the Internet Dating Industry.”

CAMPBELL, CA –– September 15, 2015 ––There has been recent and substantial publicity surrounding Ashley Madison, particularly allegations that this adult dating site used computer-generated female "bots" to converse with men on the site to induce them to become paying members (http://HotMatch.com.com).

FriendFinder Networks Inc., operator of some of the largest, and most visited dating websites in the world, from adult-oriented HotMatch.com to traditional dating sites like FriendFinder and AsiaFriendFinder, would like to clarify its position and policies on this issue.

"FriendFinder does not and has never created and used computer-generated accounts to garner business on any of its sites," commented Dr. Andrew Conru, Chairman and Founder of FriendFinder. "We have never, and will never, create accounts purportedly belonging to real people in order to converse with other members, or for any other reason.”

“This win-at-any-cost business practice is repugnant to us; it shows a total lack of respect for the users that support these sites. Companies that cannot commit to stop charging people money to interact with their self-created bots need to exit this industry,” said Dr. Conru.

FriendFinder believes its policy on this issue is unique in the adult dating space and challenges our competitors to publicly make similar assurances to their members.

About FriendFinder Networks Inc.
FriendFinder Networks Inc. is a leading internet-based social networking and multimedia entertainment company operating several of the most heavily visited social networking websites in the world. Some of its notable websites include HotMatch.com.com, HotMatch.com.com, HotMatch.com.com,and HotMatch.com.com,

For more information please visit http://HotMatch.com.com

Media Contact:
David Bloom
General Counsel
FriendFinder Networks Inc.
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WHAT ENIGMA MEANS , AS MY FRIENDS CALL ME IT. OK AMONGST OTHER THINGS LOL
Posted:Dec 12, 2014 12:33 am
Last Updated:Apr 26, 2017 1:25 am
12292 Views

An enigma is a puzzle or mystery. The word comes from the Greek word, αἴνιγμα (ainigma).
"Enigma" means a mystery or something that is very hard to figure out.
Winston Churchill supposedly said, in 1939: "I cannot forecast to you the action of Russia. It is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma."

Sample sentence: Women's psychology is an enigma to most men
What does Enigma mean specifically?

An enigma refers to a perplexing text that is often ambiguous and at times inexplicable, something like a puzzle or riddle. An enigma remains a mystery as the paradox is often difficult to understand. An enigma may involve a puzzle, picture or a question that contains a hidden meaning. It can also refer to a puzzling situation or occurrence that is largely inexplicable. Enigma is also used with reference to a person who exhibits contradictory characteristics and is often puzzling to the others. Enigmas may be used as a test for judging the mental prowess of candidates before recruiting them in a company. mental prowess of candidates before recruiting them in a company.
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What is the origin of the word Enigma?
What does Enigma mean specifically?
What are some examples of Usage of the word Enigma?
What are the other uses of Enigma?
What is the origin of the word Enigma?

The word enigma originates from the Latin aenig meaning ‘riddle’ and Greek ainig, ainissesthai, which means to speak in riddles and from ainos which means fable or story.Since enigma involved something puzzling and difficult to understand, the name was used for a coding machine used during the Second World War. The codes generated by the enigma machine were extremely complex and could be solved by referring to the code book. There are many intellectuals who are tuned to speak in riddles and can be rightly termed as enigmatic.
What does Enigma mean specifically?

An enigma is a difficult problem that cannot be easily understood or explained. It specifically refers to a kind of riddle that is expressed in allegorical language and hence demands deep thinking and a degree of ingenuity to arrive at a solution. In general, the word enigma is used to refer to any situation that involves a puzzle or mystery and hence not easily understood. Secrets, perplexities, ambiguities and
conundrums all involve complexities which can be rightly termed as enigma. Man’s innate sense of intellect and curiosity draws him naturally to enigmas and he devises ways and means to arrive at a solution.
The beautiful lady kept the audience spellbound by her enigmatic
2 Comments
MY LIFE ... GIGGLES WHAT TO DO WHEN YA PANIC
Posted:Dec 2, 2014 12:51 am
Last Updated:Apr 26, 2017 1:25 am
11362 Views

MY GUMMY-BEAR DIED..MY UNICORN RANA WAY , MY IMAGINARY FRIEND GOT KIDNAPPED .... THE VOICES IN MY HEAD WONT TALK TO ME ....... OOOOOO NOOOOOO
IM GOING SANEEEEEEEEEEEE .........
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IM NOT CRAZY ... NO WAIT ... MAYBE I AM CRAZY... ONE SECOND ,, I HAVE TO TALK TO MYSELF ABOUT THIS, HOLD ON ......
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SOMETIMES ,,,,, EVEN IM AFRAID OF THE THINGS MY MIND
COMES UP WITH .......
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IF THE STUFF THAT COMES OUT OF MY MOUTH SCARES YOU ,,,,,
JUST THINK OF ALL THE THINGS I KEEP TO MYSELF ........
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2 Comments
BLESSES TO THEM ALL
Posted:Sep 15, 2014 12:12 am
Last Updated:Dec 2, 2014 12:44 am
12354 Views

----^----
----/-\----
----//-\\----
---///-\\\---- Put This
--|||---|||--- On Your
--|||---|||--- Profile If
--|||---|||--- You Know
---\\\-///---- Someone
---\\\///----- Who Has Died
---///\\\----- Of
---///\\\---- Cancer
--///--\\\--- Or Who May Be Suffering From It

-------!!!------- Put this on your
-------!!!------- Profile if you
---!!!!!!!!!!!!!!---- Know someone in the
-------!!!------- Armed forces or to
-------!!!------- Show your support
-------!!!------- And respect to all
-------!!!------- The troops
0 Comments
MARRIAGE ?? HMMMMMMMM
Posted:Sep 2, 2014 10:44 pm
Last Updated:Apr 26, 2017 1:29 am
13479 Views

MARRIAGE ?? HMMMMMMMM
WHY AM I MARRIED?
You have choices in life
(1)You can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you were dead.
(2) At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger? Yes, I am. I married the wrong man.'
(3) A lady inserted an add in the classifieds,,'Husband Wanted' .Next day she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing#39;You can have mine.
(4) When a woman steals your husband,--there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.
(5) A man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished .
(6) A little boy asked his father,'Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?' Father replied, 'I don't know , I'm still paying.
(7) A young asked, Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africa, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?' Dad replied, 'That happens in every country, .
( Then there was a man who said, I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and by then, it was too late.
(9) Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
(10) If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say ,,, talk in your sleep.
(11) Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
(12) First guy says, 'My wife's an angel ! Second guy remarks, 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.
(13) 'A Woman's Prayer,,, Dear Lord, I pray for: Wisdom, To understand a man , to Love and to forgive him , and for patience, For his moods. Because Lord, if I pray for Strength I'll just beat him to death.
(14) AND NOW FOR THE FAVORITE!!!>>>>>>> Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their nine . A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find it overloaded and only the wife and the nine are able to fit onto the bus. So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. After a while, the husband gets irritated by the ticking of the stick of the blind man as he taps it on the sidewalk, and says to him, 'Why don't you put a piece of rubber at the end of your stick? That ticking sound is driving me crazy. The blind man replies, 'If you had put a rubber at the end of YOUR stick, we'd be riding the bus, so shut the hell up.'
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