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| Blogs > wickedeasy > wicked and that ain't so easy |
the giver should be thankful
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the giver should be thankful there is a koan in which a merchant supplies th money necessary to build a monk's school. he is upset that the monk does not thank him. this speaks to the idea of service. if one expects to be thanked then one is not doing true service. you're doing a nice thing, even an admirable thing. but wanting to be acknowledged for doing something intrinsically right dishonors the act. i was watching a mother with her at the grocery store. she patiently talked her little one through the aisles. the 's tiny hands seeking out the colorful items, were like hummingbirds, they moved so quickly. at one point her mother said to her..i think we need to come here again. and the little girl smiled and agreed and became content with the idea of a return trip..no longer needing to grab at items. how do you see presence? do you deny a desire or acknowledge it...even if it can't be fed can you be thankful in giving... You cannot conceive the many without the one. |
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1/24/2009 9:01 am |
Too often during my lifetime, WE, I have given away more than I could really afford to give away. But the things which I did not give away freely enough were .... my time, my attention and my love. We learn so much too late in life .....
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1/24/2009 10:14 am |
I can be thankful in giving and often feel that it is a true honor when I'm allowed to give....and, I mean really give.....give without the thought of repayment or expectation that I'll give again.....just allowed to give at that moment and time..... Giving is even better when the gift is simply accepted and not pushed away.....For me giving is also about receiving.....both are simple acts and should be treated as such......and, both should be appreciated for what they are, and nothing else.
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1/24/2009 1:11 pm |
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....welll .... perhaps the fault lies in an "expectation" of reward be it money, gratitude or a feeling within. However,it is nice when a bit of energy is returned because then "gratitude" is energised in both thereby creating a complete circuit or perhaps even better, "ritual" of "energy" or "karma." One bows and the other bows to "return" or "complete" the ritual creating the possibility that the acknowledgement that passes between, perhaps more than the deed itself, enlightens both.
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To give without reason serves no purpose... even to the giver. Would one mend a broken arm... when the arm is not broken? Without a need for what is received from the giver, what reason to give it is there? It is the need which must first be established, and whether that need is but to merely give. The "goal" is not so much in having the proper motive for giving... but in the proper meeting of any need. This alone allows for true thanksgiving on the part of both the receiver and the giver. Though this verse can be applied to a great many circumstances, I felt it might serve a purpose, here: Mt 7:6 Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you. And this, as well: Mt 10:16 Behold, I send you forth as sheep in the midst of wolves: be ye therefore wise as serpents, and harmless as doves. Solar... BTW: As I see it, the monk was in no real need and merely accepted the money 'cause it was there... and the merchant was not "wise as a serpent" to not recognize this. However, both were pretty much acting as normal humans. 
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1/27/2009 3:17 pm |
This one got me thinking and not so sure I like the thoughts. I have always felt good giving but have always expected acknowledgment for the giving... even if just a thank you. Thank you = gratitude = being indebted to another... gonna have to rethink this and look at my motivations. Dammit, getting tired of all this growing up stuff!!  I can't remember if I'm the good twin or the evil one.
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1/27/2009 11:07 pm |
I intensely dislike being noticed when I do things for others...at least things that are not routine that I do everyday...those I'd like a little appreciation for (the cleaning/cooking/driving that mom's do around the place). But, when I give my time, or occasionally monetary gifts, I don't want to be acknowledged...it makes me uncomfortable. Does that mean I'm serving? I don't feel like I am...I don't think about it as service...I just do it because it's important. (I love that story of the little one in the store with her mom...what a wise mommy...)  "All you'll get from strangers is surface pleasantry or indifference. Only someone who loves you will criticize you." - Judith Crist, crack film critic
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yes i feel one can be thankfull in giving...but.....some times i am to numb to see the presence....  []   Seduce my mind and my body
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